>I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape, so I got my
> doctor's permission to join a fitness club and start exercising. I
> decided to take an aerobics class for seniors. I bent, twisted,
> gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour. But, by the
> time I got my leotards on, the class was over.
>
> Reporters interviewing a 104-year-old woman: "And what do you think
> is the best thing about being 104?" the reporter asked. She simply
> replied, "No peer pressure."
>
> The nice thing about being senile is you can hide your own Easter
> eggs.
>
> Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the
> very elderly widow and asked, "How old was your husband?" "98," she
> replied. "Two years older than me." "So you're 96," the undertaker
> commented. She responded, "Hardly worth going home, is it?
>
> I've sure gotten old. I've had two bypass surgeries, a hip
> replacement, new knees. Fought prostate cancer and diabetes. I'm half
> blind, can't hear anything quieter than a jet engine, take 40 different
> medications that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts. Have
> bouts with dementia. Have poor circulation; hardly feel my hands and
> feet anymore. Can't remember if I'm 85 or 92. Have lost all my friends.
> But, thank God, I still have my driver's license.
>
> An elderly woman decided to prepare her will and told her preacher
> she had two final requests. First, she wanted to be cremated, and
> second, she wanted her ashes scattered over Wal-Mart. "Wal-Mart?" the
> preacher exclaimed. "Why Wal-Mart?" "Then I'll be sure my daughters
> visit me twice a week."
>
> My memory's not as sharp as it used to be. Also, my memory's not as
> sharp as it used to be.
>
> Know how to prevent sagging? Just eat till the wrinkles fill out.
>
> I've still got it, but nobody wants to see it.
>
> I'm getting into swing dancing. Not on purpose. Some parts of my
> body are just prone to swinging.
>
> It's scary when you start making the same noises as your
> coffeemaker.
>
> I've tried to find a suitable exercise video for women my age, but
> they haven't made one called "Buns of Putty."
>
> Don't think of it as getting hot flashes. Think of it as your inner
> child playing with matches.
>
> Don't let aging get you down. It's too hard to get back up!
Corrine,
(https://www.landzdown.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fsmilies.sofrayt.com%2Ffsc%2Fsmile3.gif&hash=677c38199faff53cb42fbf01a3f39820d04a897b)
GR@PH;<'S :breakkie: