A limerick is a five line poem.
The first two lines rhyme.
Lines 3 and 4 rhyme but not with the first two.
The last line rhymes with the first two lines.
We are at:
Even though I can see the sun,
I do not want to go out and run.
I'd rather sit and eat some pizza,
Anybody have an idea for the next line?
Even though I can see the sun,
I do not want to go out and run.
I'd rather sit and eat some pizza,
not alone as I share some with Lisa.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Even though I can see the sun,
I do not want to go out and run.
I'd rather sit and eat some pizza,
not alone as I share some with Lisa.
and we always have such fun!
Today is clean up day,
Today is clean up day,
Useless stuff thrown away.
Today is clean up day,
Useless stuff thrown away.
Recycle this recycle that,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Today is clean up day,
Useless stuff thrown away.
Recycle this recycle that,
as they say cut the fat!
Today is clean up day,
Useless stuff thrown away.
Recycle this recycle that,
as they say cut the fat!
Now the food is so dry.
Two of sand and two of cerment.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Two of sand and two of cement
Can cause a mason to lament.
Two of sand and two of cement
Can cause a mason to lament.
Laying of bricks is oh so easy with the Bricky (http://www.brickytool.com/index_eng.html)
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Two of sand and two of cement
Can cause a mason to lament.
Laying of bricks is oh so easy with the Bricky
dressed in his dark blue dickies. http://www.dickies.com/ (http://www.dickies.com/)
Two of sand and two of cement
Can cause a mason to lament.
Laying of bricks is oh so easy with the Bricky
dressed in his dark blue dickies. http://www.dickies.com/
he does look quite content!
Dinner time is quick approaching
Dinner time is quick approaching,
After witch I'll have a shower and get a socking.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Dinner time is quick approaching,
After witch I'll have a shower and get a socking.
My good book awaits on my bedside table
Dinner time is quick approaching,
After witch I'll have a shower and get a socking.
My good book awaits on my bedside table
The steamy novel of Butch and Mable.
Dinner time is quick approaching,
After witch I'll have a shower and get a socking.
My good book awaits on my bedside table
The steamy novel of Butch and Mable.
Then fall asleep, hopefully not croaking.
There once was a farmer whose cows were well fed,
There once was a farmer whose cows were well fed,
just before he went to bed.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
There once was a farmer whose cows were well fed,
just before he went to bed.
Then one night the farmer never made it home
There once was a farmer whose cows were well fed,
just before he went to bed.
Then one night the farmer never made it home
After protesting milk prices at the Capitol Dome,
There once was a farmer whose cows were well fed,
just before he went to bed.
Then one night the farmer never made it home
After protesting milk prices at the Capitol Dome,
but he got bailed by his best mate ted.
Did you know this rivers so deep,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Did you know this rivers so deep,
They call it the River Keep.
Did you know this rivers so deep,
They call it the River Keep.
In this river it is said lives a monstrous creature
Did you know this rivers so deep,
They call it the River Keep.
In this river it is said lives a monstrous creature
Only ever seen on a Sunday thats why we call her the Preacher.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Did you know this rivers so deep,
They call it the River Keep.
In this river it is said lives a monstrous creature
Only ever seen on a Sunday that's why we call her the Preacher.
So hideous, she makes all seeing her weep.
I'm trying to locate a friend of mine,
I'm trying to locate a friend of mine,
so on all the locater sites I have signed
I'm trying to locate a friend of mine,
so on all the locater sites I have signed,
I Googled the name without any luck,
I'm trying to locate a friend of mine,
so on all the locater sites I have signed,
I Googled the name without any luck,
But then I came across his name Buck.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
I'm trying to locate a friend of mine,
so on all the locater sites I have signed,
I Googled the name without any luck,
But then I came across his name Buck.
unfortunately it was not the one I was looking to find.
I saw a hawk land on my fence post
I saw a hawk land on my fence post
And the mice all scurried, lest they be toast,
I saw a hawk land on my fence post
And the mice all scurried, lest they be toast,
Many more did not survive,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
I saw a hawk land on my fence post
And the mice all scurried, lest they be toast,
Many more did not survive,
for they did not see him arrive.
I saw a hawk land on my fence post
And the mice all scurried, lest they be toast,
Many more did not survive,
for they did not see him arrive.
So now they have been Lost.
Not to long now be for it is time for bed,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Not too long now before it is time for bed,
The cobwebs already forming inside my head,
Not too long now before it is time for bed,
The cobwebs already forming inside my head,
I feel the sleepiness enveloping me
Not too long now before it is time for bed,
The cobwebs already forming inside my head,
I feel the sleepiness enveloping me,
So before I go to sleep I must go and pee.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Not too long now before it is time for bed,
The cobwebs already forming inside my head,
I feel the sleepiness enveloping me,
So before I go to sleep I must go and pee.
Or wake up three times in the night instead.
Time for vacation and I'm packing my clothes,
Time for vacation and I'm packing my clothes,
At the airport now standing in row.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Time for vacation and I'm packing my clothes,
At the airport now standing in row.
hoping security w/fat fingers will not strip search
Time for vacation and I'm packing my clothes,
At the airport now standing in row.
hoping security w/fat fingers will not strip search
nope they just left us in the lurch.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Time for vacation and I'm packing my clothes,
At the airport now standing in row.
hoping security w/fat fingers will not strip search
nope they just left us in the lurch.
As our flight takes off, calling us "no shows".
Too much time in the sun and I'm burned to a crisp
Too much time in the sun and I'm burned to a crisp
Leaving me with a bit of a lisp.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Too much time in the sun and I'm burned to a crisp
Leaving me with a bit of a lisp.
Pass the aloe pass the vinegar my skin is on fire
Too much time in the sun and I'm burned to a crisp
Leaving me with a bit of a lisp.
Pass the aloe pass the vinegar my skin is on fire.
But it's OK a I am a compulsive liar.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Too much time in the sun and I'm burned to a crisp
Leaving me with a bit of a lisp.
Pass the aloe pass the vinegar my skin is on fire.
But it's OK as I am a compulsive liar.
But with stiff lips, the truth I can't twist.
Call me frugal, call me cheap,
Call me frugal, call me cheap,
I can smell a sale even in my sleep!
Call me frugal, call me cheap,
I can smell a sale even in my sleep!
it's christmas in august, the car salesman says,
Call me frugal, call me cheap,
I can smell a sale even in my sleep!
it's christmas in august, the car salesman says,
and he looked quite funny in his big red fez!
Call me frugal, call me cheap,
I can smell a sale even in my sleep!
it's christmas in august, the car salesman says,
and he looked quite funny in his big red fez!
Not a car did he sell that discusting little creep.
There is always sun in span untill I get off the plane.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
There is always sun in Spain until I get off the plane.
And for the whole week I was ther, boy, did it rain,
There is always sun in Spain until I get off the plane.
And for the whole week I was ther, boy, did it rain,
It was a pain it rainning in spain,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
There is always sun in Spain until I get off the plane.
And for the whole week I was there, boy, did it rain,
It was a pain it raining in Spain,
Yet I could find no one to blame.
There is always sun in Spain until I get off the plane.
And for the whole week I was there, boy, did it rain,
It was a pain it raining in Spain,
Yet I could find no one to blame.
For the weather man said there would be rain in Spain!
Can you hear the mocking bird sing
Can you hear the mocking bird sing
as its sittiing on a pray and a wing.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Can you hear the mocking bird sing
as its sitting on a pray and a wing.
He thinks he is a robin, then an Oriole,
Can you hear the mocking bird sing
as its sitting on a pray and a wing.
He thinks he is a robin, then an Oriole,
he not doing much just sitting on that pole.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Can you hear the mocking bird sing
as its sitting on a pray and a wing.
He thinks he is a robin, then an Oriole,
he not doing much just sitting on that pole.
And wishing hard that it would be Spring.
Sitting at my window, gazing at my estate,
Sitting at my window, gazing at my estate,
I realize I am not getting much done at this rate.
Sitting at my window, gazing at my estate,
I realize I am not getting much done at this rate.
The lawn needs a mowin'
Sitting at my window, gazing at my estate,
I realize I am not getting much done at this rate.
The lawn needs a mowin'
And the hedges need a trimming.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Sitting at my window, gazing at my estate,
I realize I am not getting much done at this rate.
The lawn needs a mowin'
And the hedges need a trimming.
Better get at it, as it is not up for debate!
Little Junie and Katie were playing in the yard,
Little Junie and Katie were playing in the yard,
when suddenly it started to rain quite hard.
Little Junie and Katie were playing in the yard,
when suddenly it started to rain quite hard.
As they ran for cover,
Little Junie and Katie were playing in the yard,
when suddenly it started to rain quite hard.
As they ran for cover,
Katie fell banging her head so Junie went to get her Mother.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Little Junie and Katie were playing in the yard,
when suddenly it started to rain quite hard.
As they ran for cover,
Katie fell banging her head so Junie went to get her Mother.
But Katie, all banged up, is still quite the card!
The cat is in the window, the dog is on the porch,
The cat is in the window, the dog is on the porch,
The light went out so we are now searching for the torch.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The cat is in the window, the dog is on the porch,
The light went out so we are now searching for the torch.
thunder is a booming and lightening is striking
The cat is in the window, the dog is on the porch,
The light went out so we are now searching for the torch.
thunder is a booming and lightening is striking
the dog is hiding and the cats' hair is spiking.
The cat is in the window, the dog is on the porch,
The light went out so we are now searching for the torch.
thunder is a booming and lightening is striking
the dog is hiding and the cats' hair is spiking.
The tree is aflame and the yard took quite a scorch.
The road was winding and long
The road was winding and long
So we struck up a familiar song.
The road was winding and long
So we struck up a familiar song.
But we messed up the lyrics,
The road was winding and long
So we struck up a familiar song.
But we messed up the lyrics,
trying to copy the eurythmics.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The road was winding and long
So we struck up a familiar song.
But we messed up the lyrics,
trying to copy the eurythmics.
and we all laughed saying we should get the GONG!
(remember the Gong show? LOL)
I found a hidden jewel in an old box
I found a hidden jewel in an old box
It was wrapped up in a dirty pair of sox,
I found a hidden jewel in an old box
It was wrapped up in a dirty pair of sox,
twinkling and shining it caught my eye
I found a hidden jewel in an old box
It was wrapped up in a dirty pair of sox,
twinkling and shining it caught my eye
Till I saw a great big house fly
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
I found a hidden jewel in an old box
It was wrapped up in a dirty pair of sox,
twinkling and shining it caught my eye
Till I saw a great big house fly
When the big house flew, the jewel turned to rocks.
I'm sober now, so let me rest,
I'm sober now, so let me rest,
"I will not!" he said, I am the Pest.
I'm sober now, so let me rest,
"I will not!" he said, I am the Pest.
I am the pest without a vest,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
I'm sober now, so let me rest,
"I will not!" he said, I am the Pest.
I am the pest without a vest,
And a bigger pest 'cause I'm the best,
I'm sober now, so let me rest,
"I will not!" he said, I am the Pest.
I am the pest without a vest,
And a bigger pest 'cause I'm the best,
And together we would be a pest fest!
Lucky Laurel Flanders won a lottery,
Lucky Laurel Flanders won a lottery
just two days after his lobotomy.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Lucky Laurel Flanders won a lottery
just two days after his lobotomy.
He drooled over the money,
Lucky Laurel Flanders won a lottery
just two days after his lobotomy.
He drooled over the money,
said, lookie here, honey!
Lucky Laurel Flanders won a lottery
just two days after his lobotomy.
He drooled over the money,
said, lookie here, honey!
I can buy you a load of new pottery!
On the road there was a sign
On the road there was a sign
Read "Turn here and have a good time",
On the road there was a sign
Read "Turn here and have a good time",
flashing neon and blaring music
On the road there was a sign
Read "Turn here and have a good time",
flashing neon and blaring music
And the dance floor was tiled in mosaic.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
On the road there was a sign
Read "Turn here and have a good time",
flashing neon and blaring music
And the dance floor was tiled in mosaic.
Plenty of beer and mighty fine wine.
I made that turn and drove right in,
I made that turn and drove right in,
after witch my car made an awful din.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
I made that turn and drove right in,
after which my car made an awful din.
I thought it was about to blow up,
I made that turn and drove right in,
after which my car made an awful din.
I thought it was about to blow up,
So I trid my hardest to get home before it went pop.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
I made that turn and drove right in,
after which my car made an awful din.
I thought it was about to blow up,
So I trid my hardest to get home before it went pop.
If only the lottery I could win!
Puffy white clouds in a sky of blue
Puffy white clouds in a sky of blue
As they launched the Space Shuttle and upward it flew,
Puffy white clouds in a sky of blue
As they launched the Space Shuttle and upward it flew
It was out of sight in a few short moments,
Puffy white clouds in a sky of blue
As they launched the Space Shuttle and upward it flew
It was out of sight in a few short moments,
So it were of to the TV to catch up those lost events.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Puffy white clouds in a sky of blue
As they launched the Space Shuttle and upward it flew
It was out of sight in a few short moments,
So it were of to the TV to catch up those lost events.
On tv we all watched the celebration of the crew!
The crack of the bat on the ball was so loud
The crack of the bat on the ball was so loud
An obvious home run, the batter was proud,
The crack of the bat on the ball was so loud
An obvious home run, the batter was proud,
But the very next ball bowled, the umpire said thats out
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The crack of the bat on the ball was so loud
An obvious home run, the batter was proud,
But the very next ball bowled, the umpire said that's out
So everyone in the grandstands got up to shout!
The crack of the bat on the ball was so loud
An obvious home run, the batter was proud,
But the very next ball bowled, the umpire said that's out
So everyone in the grandstands got up to shout!
But the ump ignored the boos and jeers of the crowd.
Mary came in late and Mom was worried,
Mary came in late and Mom was worried,
She told Mom that she really had hurried.
Mary came in late and Mom was worried,
She told Mom that she really had hurried.
The bean for my tea are boiling dry.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Mary came in late and Mom was worried,
She told Mom that she really had hurried.
The bean for my tea are boiling dry.
Upon that, Mary began to cry.
Mary came in late and Mom was worried,
She told Mom that she really had hurried.
The bean for my tea are boiling dry.
Upon that, Mary began to cry,
Lost track of time, praying o'er the grave where Dad was buried.
I think I'll report you to the IRS,
I think I'll report you to the IRS
so that you to will be in distress.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
I think I'll report you to the IRS
so that you to will be in distress.
Prepare for the worst from the dreadful audit
I think I'll report you to the IRS
so that you to will be in distress.
Prepare for the worst from the dreadful audit
as they have found the second set of books you keeping in your Audi TT.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
I think I'll report you to the IRS
so that you to will be in distress.
Prepare for the worst from the dreadful audit
as they have found the second set of books you keeping in your Audi TT.
So perhaps I shall become a murderess?
All is quiet and abnormally calm,
All is quiet and abnormally calm,
as everyones on vacationing down at the farm.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
All is quiet and abnormally calm,
as everyone's on vacationing down at the farm.
So now a house cleaning can begin,
All is quiet and abnormally calm,
as everyone's on vacationing down at the farm.
So now a house cleaning can begin,
but it seems this task it has no end
All is quiet and abnormally calm,
as everyone's on vacationing down at the farm.
So now a house cleaning can begin,
but it seems this task it has no end,
I'll finish tomorrow, tonight it's too warm.
I ran a red light and got a ticket,
I ran a red light and got a ticket
so on the window sill it went with the others I got in a little trinket.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
I ran a red light and got a ticket
so on the window sill it went with the others I got in a little trinket.
I must pay them quickly because in jail I do not want to be
I ran a red light and got a ticket
so on the window sill it went with the others I got in a little trinket.
I must pay them quickly because in jail I do not want to be
But my credit cards are max-ed out and I just don't have the fee,
I ran a red light and got a ticket
so on the window sill it went with the others I got in a little trinket.
I must pay them quickly because in jail I do not want to be
But my credit cards are max-ed out and I just don't have the fee,
Pay days come and crads paid off, now It's off to to watch some cricket.
We were on our way home from the pub one day,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
We were on our way home from the pub one day,
When the local Bobby stopped us to say,
We were on our way home from the pub one day,
When the local Bobby stopped us to say,
Hammy good to see you not in your car
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
We were on our way home from the pub one day,
When the local Bobby stopped us to say,
Hammy good to see you not in your car
So for that you deserve a star!
We were on our way home from the pub one day,
When the local Bobby stopped us to say,
Hammy good to see you not in your car
So for that you deserve a star!
there you are here now on your way.
While cleaning a Laptop the last may
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
While cleaning a Laptop the last may
The owner called just to say,
While cleaning a Laptop the last may
The owner called just to say,
shes got a new dvd for me to fit in the empty bay .
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
While cleaning a Laptop the last may
The owner called just to say,
shes got a new DVD for me to fit in the empty bay .
I told her it was a simple install, and she said, "No way!"
While cleaning a Laptop the last may
The owner called just to say,
shes got a new DVD for me to fit in the empty bay .
I told her it was a simple install, and she said, "No way!"
So I did it for her and not a penny did she have to pay.
Everyone is going ever so green,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Everyone is going ever so green,
the sight is really something to be seen!
Everyone is going ever so green,
the sight is really something to be seen!
This planet must be saved,
Everyone is going ever so green,
the sight is really something to be seen!
This planet must be saved,
So the Martians can invade,
Everyone is going ever so green,
the sight is really something to be seen!
This planet must be saved,
So the Martians can invade,
Just to come and try our cuisine!
Our home has been going green since,
Our home has been going green since,
I stopped cooking, cleaning, laundry and hence,
Our home has been going green since,
I stopped cooking, cleaning, laundry and hence,
the housekeeping does not seem to go far
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Our home has been going green since,
I stopped cooking, cleaning, laundry and hence,
the housekeeping does not seem to go far
And things are definitely not looking too par!
Our home has been going green since,
I stopped cooking, cleaning, laundry and hence,
the housekeeping does not seem to go far
And things are definitely not looking too par!
causing the neighbors to wince!
there was an old clown from instanbul,
There was an old clown from Istanbul,
Funny he was, but not a silly old fool.
There was an old clown from Istanbul,
Funny he was, but not a silly old fool.
He wore great big baggy trousers and a big red nose
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
There was an old clown from Istanbul,
Funny he was, but not a silly old fool.
He wore great big baggy trousers and a big red nose
he was the hit of the big tent shows!
There was an old clown from Istanbul,
Funny he was, but not a silly old fool.
He wore great big baggy trousers and a big red nose
he was the hit of the big tent shows
around him things were never dull.
Bang bang goes the big red gun
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Bang bang goes the big red gun
Now we will have some great fun.
Bang bang goes the big red gun
Now we will have some great fun.
It signaled the beginning of the state fair
Bang bang goes the big red gun
Now we will have some great fun.
It signaled the beginning of the state fair
all those ladies with really wild hair
Bang bang goes the big red gun
Now we will have some great fun.
It signaled the beginning of the state fair
all those ladies with really wild hair
Always seem to have the most fun.
Was not so long ago we had out mistletoe
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Was not so long ago we had out mistletoe
Making us stretch up so high on tippytoe.
Was not so long ago we had out mistletoe
Making us stretch up so high on tippytoe.
Stealing kisses when no one was watching
Was not so long ago we had out mistletoe
Making us stretch up so high on tippytoe.
Stealing kisses when no one was watching
But Gramma, she saw as she was swatching.
Was not so long ago we had out mistletoe
Making us stretch up so high on tippytoe.
Stealing kisses when no one was watching
But Gramma, she saw as she was swatching,
The derriere grabbing antics of Uncle Joe.
The leaves are turning colors and the days are getting shorter,
The leaves are turning colors and the days are getting shorter,
the squirrels hiding their nuts are getting smarter
The leaves are turning colors and the days are getting shorter,
the squirrels hiding their nuts are getting smarter
tho they forget where they put 'em
The leaves are turning colors and the days are getting shorter,
the squirrels hiding their nuts are getting smarter
tho they forget where they put 'em
Which can create something of a mayhem.
The leaves are turning colors and the days are getting shorter,
the squirrels hiding their nuts are getting smarter
tho they forget where they put 'em
Which can create something of a mayhem.
It makes their work so much harder!
The reflection in the window caused a gasp
The reflection in the window caused a gasp
so they had a metal fram made for it and to take of the sharp edges the guy used a rasp.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The reflection in the window caused a gasp
so they had a metal fram made for it and to take of the sharp edges the guy used a rasp.
The reflection still appeared which caused great fear!
The reflection in the window caused a gasp
so they had a metal frame made for it and to take off the sharp edges the guy used a rasp.
The reflection still appeared which caused great fear!
The awful screams echoed, they're here, they're HERE!
The reflection in the window caused a gasp
so they had a metal frame made for it and to take off the sharp edges the guy used a rasp.
The reflection still appeared which caused great fear!
The awful screams echoed, they're here, they're HERE!
So so all went out to see Cleopatra asp.
It seems af if pillow fighting is the next thing to be banned,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
it seems as if pillow fighting is the next thing to be banned,
as from the dorm she was canned,
it seems as if pillow fighting is the next thing to be banned,
as from the dorm she was canned,
feathers were seen floating a mile from the scene!
it seems as if pillow fighting is the next thing to be banned,
as from the dorm she was canned,
feathers were seen floating a mile from the scene!
As they floated down on some old officer's bean.
it seems as if pillow fighting is the next thing to be banned,
as from the dorm she was canned,
feathers were seen floating a mile from the scene!
As they floated down on some old officer's bean.
They got thrown out so they went and played down on the sand.
---
We had a pet who hated going to see the vet
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
We had a pet who hated going to see the vet,
We had to trick her and then catch her with a net.
We had a pet who hated going to see the vet,
We had to trick her and then catch her with a net.
then once we we there she be as good as gold,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
We had a pet who hated going to see the vet,
We had to trick her and then catch her with a net.
then once we were there she be as good as gold,
But our vet must show, that he's really quite bold.
We had a pet who hated going to see the vet,
We had to trick her and then catch her with a net.
then once we were there she be as good as gold,
But our vet must show, that he's really quite bold.
his own fault as when she was young he through her in the swimming pool to get her wet.
Halloween is nearly upon us the wizard he did say,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Halloween is nearly upon us the wizard he did say,
That's when the ghost's and goblins come on out to play.
Halloween is nearly upon us the wizard he did say,
That's when the ghost's and goblins come on out to play.
as the hair stands up upon my neck,
Halloween is nearly upon us the wizard he did say,
That's when the ghost's and goblins come on out to play.
as the hair stands up upon my neck,
they go boo an I said what the heck.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Halloween is nearly upon us the wizard he did say,
That's when the ghost's and goblins come on out to play.
as the hair stands up upon my neck,
they go boo an I said what the heck.
The ghouls, they don't come out in the day.
Screeching and howling are the games of a ghoul,
Screeching and howling are the games of a ghoul,
we all should play them said Raulo.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Screeching and howling are the games of a ghoul,
we all should play them said Raulo.
Trick or treaters love a nice good scare
Screeching and howling are the games of a ghoul,
we all should play them said Raulo.
Trick or treaters love a nice good scare
thats why around here they carry pieces of meat witch is of cause very rare.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Screeching and howling are the games of a ghoul,
we all should play them said Raulo.
Trick or treaters love a nice good scare
thats why around here they carry pieces of meat witch is of cause very rare.
They know better than to try that at school!
The day was rainy and dark
The day was rainy and dark
the dogs barked all the way to the park.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The day was rainy and dark
the dogs barked all the way to the park.
There is something in the bushes,
The day was rainy and dark
the dogs barked all the way to the park.
There is something in the bushes,
jumping out on the people that get off the buses.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The day was rainy and dark
the dogs barked all the way to the park.
There is something in the bushes,
jumping out on the people that get off the buses.
Leaving on each and every one his mark!
A man walks along the long lonely road.
A man walks along the long lonely road.
Something wasn't right he forebode.
A man walks along the long lonely road.
Something wasn't right he forebode.
a man with blood running down either side of his mouth
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
A man walks along the long lonely road.
Something wasn't right he forebode.
a man with blood running down either side of his mouth
jumped out at him and made him shout.
A man walks along the long lonely road.
Something wasn't right he forebode.
a man with blood running down either side of his mouth
jumped out at him and made him shout.
look out you nearly killed that toad.
Clicking buttons everyday,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Clicking buttons everyday,
Can led some to go astray.
Clicking buttons everyday,
Can led some to go astray.
All I did was click on Enter,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Clicking buttons everyday,
Can led some to go astray.
All I did was click on Enter,
Me thinks me needs a mentor!
Clicking buttons everyday,
Can led some to go astray.
All I did was click on Enter,
Me thinks me needs a mentor!
PC all fixed thank to Landzdown and E-Bay.
Picked up a bargin from the net today,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Picked up a bargain from the net today,
At that bargain place I wanted to stay.
Picked up a bargain from the net today,
At that bargain place I wanted to stay.
Evan saw Lena at the tills
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Picked up a bargain from the net today,
At that bargain place I wanted to stay.
Evan saw Lena at the tills
Shelling out the real big bills.
Picked up a bargain from the net today,
At that bargain place I wanted to stay.
Evan saw Lena at the tills
Shelling out the real big bills.
Now to go home and scan the net for more.
Are you ready for Halloween
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Are you ready for Halloween
are you going to make the little children scream?
Are you ready for Halloween
are you going to make the little children scream?
Or will your Treat them quite handily?
Are you ready for Halloween
are you going to make the little children scream?
Or will your Treat them quite handily?
By opening the door dressed quite scantily
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Are you ready for Halloween
are you going to make the little children scream?
Or will your Treat them quite handily?
By opening the door dressed quite scantily
Hey REMEMBER, it is Halloween!
As the black cat crosses the road,
As the black cat crosses the road,
he spotted the big fat toad.
As the black cat crosses the road,
he spotted the big fat toad.
That toad was in the middle of the road,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
As the black cat crosses the road,
he spotted the big fat toad.
That toad was in the middle of the road,
But as the truck came by carrying a heavy load
As the black cat crosses the road,
he spotted the big fat toad.
That toad was in the middle of the road,
But as the truck came by carrying a heavy load
The cat said, "Bye-Bye you sweet fat toad."
The Jack-O-Lantern's smile was eerie,
The Jack-O-Lantern's smile was eerie,
making me feel quite leery.
The Jack-O-Lantern's smile was eerie,
making me feel quite leery.
I got in my car and went for a drive,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The Jack-O-Lantern's smile was eerie,
making me feel quite leery.
I got in my car and went for a drive,
only to discover that Jack-O-Lantern was INSIDE! :thud:
The Jack-O-Lantern's smile was eerie,
making me feel quite leery.
I got in my car and went for a drive,
only to discover that Jack-O-Lantern was INSIDE! :thud:
The Lateran's out my car windows all smeary.
Have you played a game on one of these game stations.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Have you played a game on one of these game stations.
they seem to have swept the entire nation!
Have you played a game on one of these game stations.
they seem to have swept the entire nation!
Now you can play with your wii,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Have you played a game on one of these game stations.
they seem to have swept the entire nation!
Now you can play with your wii,
As many have come to see.
Have you played a game on one of these game stations.
they seem to have swept the entire nation!
Now you can play with your wii,
As many have come to see.
games are without ration!
there was a young lass from microsoft,
there was a young lass from microsoft
Who worked way up in the loft
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
there was a young lass from microsoft
Who worked way up in the loft
And was extremely afraid of heights!
there was a young lass from microsoft
Who worked way up in the loft
And was extremely afraid of heights!
And she wore the most sexy tights.
There was a young lass from microsoft
Who worked way up in the loft
And was extremely afraid of heights!
And she wore the most sexy tights.
just to torment the guys from grisoft.
belive it or not there was once was a woman who had no brain.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Believe it or not there was once was a woman who had no brain.
It was determined she may have lost it due to the strain.
Believe it or not there was once was a woman who had no brain.
It was determined she may have lost it due to the strain.
from deciding which shoes to wear
Believe it or not there was once was a woman who had no brain.
It was determined she may have lost it due to the strain.
from deciding which shoes to wear
She saw the kids looking so shen gave them a glear.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Believe it or not there was once was a woman who had no brain.
It was determined she may have lost it due to the strain.
from deciding which shoes to wear
She saw the kids looking so then gave them a glare.
With a whoosh and a swish, she jumped on a train.
Little Bobbi was wrought with pain,
Little Bobbi was wrought with pain
the pain was all down the left hand side again.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Little Bobbi was wrought with pain
the pain was all down the left hand side again.
he'd eaten red beans
Little Bobbi was wrought with pain
the pain was all down the left hand side again.
he'd eaten red beans
we know that cause they were all down his new jeans.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Little Bobbi was wrought with pain
the pain was all down the left hand side again.
he'd eaten red beans
we know that cause they were all down his new jeans.
That dreaded gas it did cause him, to bloat and retain.
One dreary day an ole hound dog went sniffing,
One dreary day an ole hound dog went sniffing,
and was found running around with our bearded collie Pippin.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
One dreary day an ole hound dog went sniffing,
and was found running around with our bearded collie Pippin.
As they frolicked about they suddenly found,
One dreary day an ole hound dog went sniffing,
and was found running around with our bearded collie Pippin.
As they frolicked about they suddenly found,
a very very unusual and stinky mound!
One dreary day an ole hound dog went sniffing,
and was found running around with our bearded collie Pippin.
As they frolicked about they suddenly found,
a very very unusual and stinky mound!
Made them all in then end start sneezing.
The letter went on oh dear John,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The letter went on oh dear John,
I wish you would just go jump in a pond!
The letter went on oh dear John,
I wish you would just go jump in a pond!
Then at the end of the letter is said,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The letter went on oh dear John,
I wish you would just go jump in a pond!
Then at the end of the letter is said,
and perhaps you should have a doctor examine your Head!
The letter went on oh dear John,
I wish you would just go jump in a pond!
Then at the end of the letter is said,
and perhaps you should have a doctor examine your Head!
You must think I am a really dumb blond.
Well as the saga continues, a lesson is learned,
Well as the saga continues, a lesson is learned,
there are many things in life that must be earned.
Well as the saga continues, a lesson is learned,
there are many things in life that must be earned.
Like the meaning of Love.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Well as the saga continues, a lesson is learned,
there are many things in life that must be earned.
Like the meaning of Love.
And how to thank the one above.
Well as the saga continues, a lesson is learned,
there are many things in life that must be earned.
Like the meaning of Love.
And how to thank the one above.
Well as the saga continues, a lesson is learned,
there are many things in life that must be earned.
Like the meaning of Love.
And how to thank the one above.
right up till the point we are being morned.
Thanksgiving will soon be upon us all,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Thanksgiving will soon be upon us all,
Our hopes that everyone just has a ball.
Thanksgiving will soon be upon us all,
Our hopes that everyone just has a ball.
Sharing time and food with our loved ones is such a treat
Thanksgiving will soon be upon us all,
Our hopes that everyone just has a ball.
Sharing time and food with our loved ones is such a treat
witch is always a pleasure and so very sweet.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Thanksgiving will soon be upon us all,
Our hopes that everyone just has a ball.
Sharing time and food with our loved ones is such a treat
witch is always a pleasure and so very sweet.
Thanksgiving it seems, spells the end of Fall.
As Winter shall soon begin.
As Winter shall soon begin.
It means all the sun and fun of summer comes to an end.
As Winter shall soon begin.
It means all the sun and fun of summer comes to an end.
it will be snowmen the kids will be wanting us to be a diggin,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
As Winter shall soon begin.
It means all the sun and fun of summer comes to an end.
it will be snowmen the kids will be wanting us to be a diggin,
Warm soups and drinks we will be sippin.
As Winter shall soon begin.
It means all the sun and fun of summer comes to an end.
it will be snowmen the kids will be wanting us to be a diggin,
Warm soups and drinks we will be sippin.
The Holidays will be upon us to share with our kin.
The turkey was waddling about in the yard
The turkey was waddling about in the yard
His weight is more like a ton of lard.
The turkey was waddling about in the yard
His weight is more like a ton of lard.
Catching her will be an easy task,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The turkey was waddling about in the yard
His weight is more like a ton of lard.
Catching her will be an easy task,
even if you've opened the flask!
The turkey was waddling about in the yard
His weight is more like a ton of lard.
Catching her will be an easy task,
even if you've opened the flask!
I think she suspects she has put up her guard!
As the leaves fall from the trees
As the leaves fall from the trees
you know that theres a bit of a breeze.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
As the leaves fall from the trees
you know that there's a bit of a breeze.
It has a certain bite of chill,
As the leaves fall from the trees
you know that there's a bit of a breeze.
It has a certain bite of chill,
this wonderful weather I just can not get my fill!
As the leaves fall from the trees
you know that there's a bit of a breeze.
It has a certain bite of chill,
this wonderful weather I just can not get my fill!
Just got to watch the weather as it is going to freeze.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
what is our next rhyme?
Woops I said Forgotten to start over.
@R-C thanks :thumbsup:
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Woops I said Forgotten to start over.
I was busy taking a nice nap under the cover.
Woops I said Forgotten to start over.
I was busy taking a nice nap under the cover.
Now all that is needed to get me going,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Woops I said Forgotten to start over.
I was busy taking a nice nap under the cover.
Now all that is needed to get me going,
is a nice hot drink to get my juices flowing!
Woops I said Forgotten to start over.
I was busy taking a nice nap under the cover.
Now all that is needed to get me going,
is a nice hot drink to get my juices flowing!
then I put pen to paper and drew the frunt cover.
Once there was a man a vary little man,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Once there was a man a very little man,
That could fit in a garbage can.
Once there was a man a very little man,
That could fit in a garbage can.
we'ed to roll him along singing a song,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Once there was a man a very little man,
That could fit in a garbage can.
we'd to roll him along singing a song,
As he bounced about like a ping pong.
Once there was a man a very little man,
That could fit in a garbage can.
we'd to roll him along singing a song,
As he bounced about like a ping pong.
we never knew exactly where he might land!
It was a perfect day to read a good book
It was a perfect day to read a good book
Then have a go on the loto to try my luck.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
It was a perfect day to read a good book
Then have a go on the Lotto to try my luck.
As luck would have it, a winner was named,
It was a perfect day to read a good book
Then have a go on the Lotto to try my luck.
As luck would have it, a winner was named,
it was an old woman who had the ticket framed.
It was a perfect day to read a good book
Then have a go on the Lotto to try my luck.
As luck would have it, a winner was named,
it was an old woman who had the ticket framed.
So I drowned my sorrows down the the Old Bull and Duck.
While filming on the set of Madagascar,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
While filming on the set of Madagascar,
there was a terrible accident involving a sports car.
While filming on the set of Madagascar,
there was a terrible accident involving a sports car.
Noone was hurt but except the car its a right off,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
While filming on the set of Madagascar,
there was a terrible accident involving a sports car.
No one was hurt but except the car its a write off,
The driver claimed a very bad cough.
While filming on the set of Madagascar,
there was a terrible accident involving a sports car.
No one was hurt but except the car its a write off,
The driver claimed a very bad cough.
But we all put it down to his smoking a big cigar.
It is that time of year again where we all party time the snow has fallen,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
It is that time of year again where we all party time the snow has fallen,
in our cars tons of presents we will be haulin
It is that time of year again where we all party time the snow has fallen,
in our cars tons of presents we will be haulin.
Through the snow Leiden roads we will be venturing,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
It is that time of year again where we all party time the snow has fallen,
in our cars tons of presents we will be haulin.
Through the snow Leiden roads we will be venturing,
But our language could use some censuring!
It is that time of year again where we all party time the snow has fallen,
in our cars tons of presents we will be haulin.
Through the snow Leiden roads we will be venturing,
But our language could use some censuring!
as drunken drivers sure are callin'!
twas a young mermaid from the sea,
Twas a young mermaid from the sea,
Who always sang with such glee.
Twas a young mermaid from the sea,
Who always sang with such glee.
Till one day in a fishing net she did get entangled
Twas a young mermaid from the sea,
Who always sang with such glee.
Till one day in a fishing net she did get entangled
Oh God forbid, she almost strangled.
Twas a young mermaid from the sea,
Who always sang with such glee.
Till one day in a fishing net she did get entangled
Oh God forbid, she almost strangled.
but a fisherman did come to save the day and together they did flee!
The tree is up and the lights are twinkling
The tree is up and the lights are twinkling
and the naughty elf was a tinkling
The tree is up and the lights are twinkling
and the naughty elf was a tinkling.
Bangs goes the main house fuse,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The tree is up and the lights are twinkling
and the naughty elf was a tinkling.
Bangs goes the main house fuse,
So the fuse box, he did peruse
The tree is up and the lights are twinkling
and the naughty elf was a tinkling.
Bangs goes the main house fuse,
So the fuse box, he did peruse
while his sprinkler was still a sting-kling!
santa's elves did lay in wait,
santa's elves did lay in wait,
for they surely did not want to be late
santa's elves did lay in wait,
for they surely did not want to be late
The sleigh was loaded, as was Santa.
santa's elves did lay in wait,
for they surely did not want to be late
The sleigh was loaded, as was Santa.
Even Rudolf was ready to canter.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
santa's elves did lay in wait,
for they surely did not want to be late
The sleigh was loaded, as was Santa.
Even Rudolf was ready to canter.
their good flying not left to fate!
under the mistletoe stood the elf,
under the mistletoe stood the elf,
Making sure this year that he's not being left on the shelf.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Under the mistletoe stood the elf,
Making sure this year that he's not being left on the shelf.
He is the most misunderstood fellow,
Under the mistletoe stood the elf,
Making sure this year that he's not being left on the shelf.
He is the most misunderstood fellow,
merely wanting to kiss miss mellow,
Under the mistletoe stood the elf,
Making sure this year that he's not being left on the shelf.
He is the most misunderstood fellow,
merely wanting to kiss miss mellow,
After his kiss of he went once again being himself.
Santa will soon be on his way,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Santa will soon be on his way,
like tiger, ho ho ho, he did say,
Santa will soon be on his way,
like tiger, ho ho ho, he did say,
So soon we will all be tucked up in our beds,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Santa will soon be on his way,
like tiger, ho ho ho, he did say,
So soon we will all be tucked up in our beds,
with visions of golf balls in our heads,
Santa will soon be on his way,
like tiger, ho ho ho, he did say,
So soon we will all be tucked up in our beds,
with visions of golf balls in our heads,
Hoping that Jolly Old Elf would not stray.
The cookies are baked, the house is clean,
The cookies are baked, the house is clean
All were waiting for now is a visit from the queen.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The cookies are baked, the house is clean
All were waiting for now is a visit from the queen.
The snow queen that would be blowing in with the icy wind.
The cookies are baked, the house is clean
All were waiting for now is a visit from the queen.
The snow queen that would be blowing in with the icy wind.
Chilling to the bone, all of those that are fair skinned.
The cookies are baked, the house is clean
All were waiting for now is a visit from the queen.
The snow queen that would be blowing in with the icy wind.
Chilling to the bone, all of those that are fair skinned.
And freezing in their shoes those that are too lean!
The New Year is approaching, celebrations it will bring
The New Year is approaching, celebrations it will bring
A new bunch of drunks, that really can't sing!
The New Year is approaching, celebrations it will bring
A new bunch of drunks, that really can't sing!
The ball will be falling from out of the sky!
The New Year is approaching, celebrations it will bring
A new bunch of drunks, that really can't sing!
The ball will be falling from out of the sky!
don't let the drinks splash in your eye
The New Year is approaching, celebrations it will bring
A new bunch of drunks, that really can't sing!
The ball will be falling from out of the sky!
don't let the drinks splash in your eye
Nor those nasty pigeons just taking wing.
The New Year has arrived with an arctic blast,
The New Year has arrived with an arctic blast,
let us all hope that it will leave quite fast
The New Year has arrived with an arctic blast,
let us all hope that it will leave quite fast
with my tongue stuck to the light pole, :laughing:
The New Year has arrived with an arctic blast,
let us all hope that it will leave quite fast
with my tongue stuck to the light pole,
and my feet are getting very very cold!
The New Year has arrived with an arctic blast,
let us all hope that it will leave quite fast
with my tongue stuck to the light pole,
and my feet are getting very very cold!
after freeing him we just had to invite him as our new guest.
The weatherman siad it was goming to snow,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The weatherman said it was going to snow,
however, what her bikini didn't show,
The weatherman said it was going to snow,
however, what her bikini didn't show,
Was the bruise that she got after falling over on black ice.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The weatherman said it was going to snow,
however, what her bikini didn't show,
Was the bruise that she got after falling over on black ice.
Dial-in viewer from Mawford Mews said that she still looked pretty nice,
The weatherman said it was going to snow,
however, what her bikini didn't show,
Was the bruise that she got after falling over on black ice.
Dial-in viewer from Mawford Mews said that she still looked pretty nice,
so after eating we all set in frunt of the TV ready for the show.
Another two inches of snow has fallen here a gain today.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Another two inches of snow has fallen here a gain today.
wish wish pray pray make it all go away!
Another two inches of snow has fallen here a gain today.
wish wish pray pray make it all go away!
It not fun anymore as I can not get out of my own frunt door,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Another two inches of snow has fallen here a gain today.
wish wish pray pray make it all go away!
It not fun anymore as I can not get out of my own frunt door,
And tomorrow the weatherman is calling for more,
Another two inches of snow has fallen here a gain today.
wish wish pray pray make it all go away!
It not fun anymore as I can not get out of my own frunt door,
And tomorrow the weatherman is calling for more,
Still it is a shame i can not run round with the grandchildren pulling there sleigh.
The PC stopped working all I did was press enter.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The PC stopped working all I did was press enter.
When I reboot there appears a dancing elf right in the center!
The PC stopped working all I did was press enter.
When I reboot there appears a dancing elf right in the center!
So I called up Norton and told him to scan,
The PC stopped working all I did was press enter.
When I reboot there appears a dancing elf right in the center!
So I called up Norton and told him to scan,
They answered back, PC ready for the can.
The PC stopped working all I did was press enter.
When I reboot there appears a dancing elf right in the center!
So I called up Norton and told him to scan,
They answered back, PC ready for the can.
But then I was told about LandzDown by my Mentor.
Once long ago there were foot prints in the snow,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Once long ago there were foot prints in the snow,
They formed a circle, like the letter O,
Once long ago there were foot prints in the snow,
They formed a circle, like the letter O,
These peculiar prints, how were they made?
Once long ago there were foot prints in the snow,
They formed a circle, like the letter O,
These peculiar prints, how were they made?
by that loverble rouge who drinks lemonade
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Once long ago there were foot prints in the snow,
They formed a circle, like the letter O,
These peculiar prints, how were they made?
by that loverble rouge who drinks lemonade
Who somehow underlined that big circle in yellow!
I've got a bad case of Cabin Fever,
I've got a bad case of Cabin Fever,
all because of a book that cost a fiver.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
I've got a bad case of Cabin Fever,
all because of a book that cost a fiver.
Bundle up in layers and put on your boots
I've got a bad case of Cabin Fever,
all because of a book that cost a fiver.
Bundle up in layers and put on your boots
Get out and enjoy some winter pursuits,
I've got a bad case of Cabin Fever,
all because of a book that cost a fiver.
Bundle up in layers and put on your boots
Get out and enjoy some winter pursuits,
else you'll get a new child in novemver!
Temmu forgot to start a new one,
there was an old goat from ohio,
there was an old goat from ohio,
Who had a nanny living down on the bayou,
There was an old goat from Ohio,
Who had a nanny living down on the bayou,
This old goat had many friends and enemies too,
There was an old goat from Ohio,
Who had a nanny living down on the bayou,
This old goat had many friends and enemies too,
Evan ended up being branded with the number two.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
There was an old goat from Ohio,
Who had a nanny living down on the bayou,
This old goat had many friends and enemies too,
Evan ended up being branded with the number two.
next we heard he was seen performing at the rodeo!
The rodeo is coming to town!
The rodeo is coming to town!
In a parade led by a clown,
The rodeo is coming to town!
In a parade led by a clown,
With barrels and ropes they came,
The rodeo is coming to town!
In a parade led by a clown,
With barrels and ropes they came,
and the bulls were so big and none were tame!
The rodeo is coming to town!
In a parade led by a clown,
With barrels and ropes they came,
and the bulls were so big and none were tame!
As soon as it opens, I'm going down.
I bought a ticket and got a front seat,
I bought a ticket and got a front seat.
unfortunetly there was water of the floor so I got wet feet.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
I bought a ticket and got a front seat.
unfortunately there was water of the floor so I got wet feet.
My seat is near the turnout chute,
I bought a ticket and got a front seat.
unfortunately there was water of the floor so I got wet feet.
My seat is near the turnout chute,
But at least there is a mirror to remind me that I am so cute.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
I bought a ticket and got a front seat.
unfortunately there was water of the floor so I got wet feet.
My seat is near the turnout chute,
But at least there is a mirror to remind me that I am so cute.
those poor rodeo clowns are sure taking the Heat!
There were ropers and riders and dancing horses
and pretty lasses, of courses!
There were ropers and riders and dancing horses
and pretty lasses, of courses!
There under starter orders anf there off
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
There were ropers and riders and dancing horses
and pretty lasses, of courses!
There under starter orders anf there off
The rider was bucked, but the landing was soft.
There were ropers and riders and dancing horses
and pretty lasses, of courses!
There under starter orders anf there off
The rider was bucked, but the landing was soft.
the horse went on and ran the course.
Five children were out playing one day,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Five children were out playing one day,
it was a very sunny day in May.
Five children were out playing one day,
it was a very sunny day in May.
It was a hot day all would say,
Five children were out playing one day,
it was a very sunny day in May.
It was a hot day all would say,
Til the sun sank in the bay,
Five children were out playing one day,
it was a very sunny day in May.
It was a hot day all would say,
Til the sun sank in the bay,
The hot day of playing faded away.
The ice had grown rather thin,
The ice had grown rather thin,
The two husky skaters fell in,
The ice had grown rather thin,
The two husky skaters fell in,
The rescue team went out in a sled
The ice had grown rather thin,
The two husky skaters fell in,
The rescue team went out in a sled
Fearing the two skaters were dead,
The ice had grown rather thin,
The two husky skaters fell in,
The rescue team went out in a sled
Fearing the two skaters were dead,
but they found two live men.
Leaves are flying on the breeze
Leaves are flying on the breeze
The pollen in the air makes me sneeze,
Leaves are flying on the breeze
The pollen in the air makes me sneeze,
Soon be that time of year when the whenthe grass will need cutting.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Leaves are flying on the breeze
The pollen in the air makes me sneeze,
Soon be that time of year when the whenthe grass will need cutting.
And the prong horns will begin butting.
Leaves are flying on the breeze
The pollen in the air makes me sneeze,
Soon be that time of year when the whenthe grass will need cutting.
And the prong horns will begin butting.
we will be working in the flower beds down on our knees!
The gallant gent who rode to the rescue of the damsel
The gallant gent who rode to the rescue of the damsel
Was laughed at when he drove up in his '58 Edsel,
The gallant gent who rode to the rescue of the damsel
Was laughed at when he drove up in his '58 Edsel,
But he did have the last laugh selling it for $55.000 on Ebay,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The gallant gent who rode to the rescue of the damsel
Was laughed at when he drove up in his '58 Edsel,
But he did have the last laugh selling it for $55.000 on Ebay,
Until the buyer balked, said it was just too much to pay,
The gallant gent who rode to the rescue of the damsel
Was laughed at when he drove up in his '58 Edsel,
But he did have the last laugh selling it for $55.000 on Ebay,
Until the buyer balked, said it was just too much to pay,
to which the seller said you sir are a weasel!
Donations to Haiti are now arriving
Donations to Haiti are now arriving,
With hopes that more people are surviving,
Donations to Haiti are now arriving,
With hopes that more people are surviving,
rescue crews and dogs are now on the scene
Donations to Haiti are now arriving,
With hopes that more people are surviving,
rescue crews and dogs are now on the scene
in the hope that someone will be brougt out safe not very clean.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Donations to Haiti are now arriving,
With hopes that more people are surviving,
rescue crews and dogs are now on the scene
in the hope that someone will be brought out safe not very clean,
and receive the medical care which the doctors are all striving,
We had a winter storm again, this time six inches of snow,
We had a winter storm again, this time six inches of snow,
Drifting up to 10 feet in some places due to the winds blow.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
We had a winter storm again, this time six inches of snow,
Drifting up to 10 feet in some places due to the winds blow.
It's Groundhog Day; what'll we hear from Punxsutawney Phil
We had a winter storm again, this time six inches of snow,
Drifting up to 10 feet in some places due to the winds blow.
It's Groundhog Day; what'll we hear from Punxsutawney Phil
it will snow and the gas company will send es one hell of a big bill.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
We had a winter storm again, this time six inches of snow,
Drifting up to 10 feet in some places due to the winds blow.
It's Groundhog Day; what'll we hear from Punxsutawney Phil
it will snow and the gas company will send es one hell of a big bill.
Six more weeks of winter 'til the flowers start to grow.
There was an old cobbler from the County of Cork,
There was an old cobbler from the County of Cork,
where in sted of money the butcher pays him in pork.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
There was an old cobbler from the County of Cork,
where in stead of money the butcher pays him in pork.
The mechanic also pays with his service,
There was an old cobbler from the County of Cork,
where in stead of money the butcher pays him in pork.
The mechanic also pays with his service,
Although it made his customers nervous,
There was an old cobbler from the County of Cork,
where in stead of money the butcher pays him in pork.
The mechanic also pays with his service,
Although it made his customers nervous,
Cause when the car squealed, he'd fix it with a fork.
Back in my youth, I walked ten miles to school,
Back in my youth, I walked ten miles to school,
All my classmates thought I was a fool.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Back in my youth, I walked ten miles to school,
All my classmates thought I was a fool.
Got plenty of exercise, breathed lots of fresh air,
Back in my youth, I walked ten miles to school,
All my classmates thought I was a fool.
Got plenty of exercise, breathed lots of fresh air,
I would challenge others to do the same on a dare.
Back in my youth, I walked ten miles to school,
All my classmates thought I was a fool.
Got plenty of exercise, breathed lots of fresh air,
I would challenge others to do the same on a dare.
Witch normally left me getting wet after being thrown into the swimming pool.
Remembered to or Netty's bouquet,chocolates oh and card ready for Valentines day,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Remembered to or Netty's bouquet,chocolates oh and card ready for Valentines day,
What a waste of good money I say!
Remembered to or Netty's bouquet,chocolates oh and card ready for Valentines day,
What a waste of good money I say!
But Netty deserves it, as GR@PH's better half,
Remembered to or Netty's bouquet,chocolates oh and card ready for Valentines day,
What a waste of good money I say!
But Netty deserves it, as GR@PH's better half,
He's such a clown, he could make Eeyore laugh,
Remembered to or Netty's bouquet,chocolates oh and card ready for Valentines day,
What a waste of good money I say!
But Netty deserves it, as GR@PH's better half,
He's such a clown, he could make Eeyore laugh,
how sweet that he wants to make her have a special day!
I worked too hard now I have an aching back
I worked too hard now I have an aching back.
The chiropractor said it just needs a crack
I worked too hard now I have an aching back.
The chiropractor said it just needs a crack
But after today when I'm done shoveling snow,
I worked too hard now I have an aching back.
The chiropractor said it just needs a crack
But after today when I'm done shoveling snow,
My little plants on the wondow sill has even started to grow.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
I worked too hard now I have an aching back.
The chiropractor said it just needs a crack
But after today when I'm done shoveling snow,
My little plants on the window-sill have even started to grow.
I'm cooking them as herbs, and I think I've got the knack.
I love eating meat, but I won't eat brains.
I love eating meat, but I won't eat brains.
In my digestive tract, it give me those pains,
I love eating meat, but I won't eat brains.
In my digestive tract, it give me those pains.
I much prefer a New York cut, with French-fries on the side,
I love eating meat, but I won't eat brains.
In my digestive tract, it give me those pains.
I much prefer a New York cut, with French-fries on the side,
Smothered in sauteed mushrooms, with onions deep fried,
I love eating meat, but I won't eat brains.
In my digestive tract, it give me those pains.
I much prefer a New York cut, with French-fries on the side,
Smothered in sauteed mushrooms, with onions deep fried,
Some things that can make those dentures strain.
Maude Elder's cow has just given birth,
Maude Elder's cow has just given birth,
Maude said in a lisp that this was her firth,
Maude Elder's cow has just given birth,
Maude said in a lisp that this was her firth,
The father, Bill the bull, looks as proud as Punch
Maude Elder's cow has just given birth,
Maude said in a lisp that this was her firth,
The father, Bill the bull, looks as proud as Punch
He sired many calves, this was the best of the bunch,
Maude Elder's cow has just given birth,
Maude said in a lisp that this was her firth,
The father, Bill the bull, looks as proud as Punch
He sired many calves, this was the best of the bunch,
Although it was a bit fat 'round the girth.
I'm on my 15th beer, and I'm yet to feel the pain
I'm on my 15th beer, and I'm yet to feel the pain
In the morning I may not be sane!
I'm on my 15th beer, and I'm yet to feel the pain
In the morning I may not be sane!
But tonight's the night, so I don't really care,
I'm on my 15th beer, and I'm yet to feel the pain
In the morning I may not be sane!
But tonight's the night, so I don't really care,
and just might do anything on a dare!
I'm on my 15th beer, and I'm yet to feel the pain
In the morning I may not be sane!
But tonight's the night, so I don't really care,
and just might do anything on a dare!
So I might as well just start drinking beer again!
My computer has a virus that I can't hunt down
My computer has a virus that I can't hunt down
for that the best place to be is here at LandzDown!
My computer has a virus that I can't hunt down
for that the best place to be is here at LandzDown!
Corrine will show me how to fix it,
My computer has a virus that I can't hunt down
for that the best place to be is here at LandzDown!
Corrine will show me how to fix it,
While i say down drinking a coffee and eating a biscuit.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
My computer has a virus that I can't hunt down
for that the best place to be is here at LandzDown!
Corrine will show me how to fix it,
While i say down drinking a coffee and eating a biscuit.
I'll be back up and running, getting rid of my frown.
February is waning and March is almost here,
February is waning and March is almost here,
So we are throwing a party so who wants a beer.
GR@PH;<'S
February is waning and March is almost here,
So we are throwing a party so who wants a beer.
I'll have one, GR@PH, over here in Oz
February is waning and March is almost here,
So we are throwing a party so who wants a beer.
I'll have one, GR@PH, over here in Oz
I'll guzzle it down without even a pause,
February is waning and March is almost here,
So we are throwing a party so who wants a beer.
I'll have one, GR@PH, over here in Oz
I'll guzzle it down without even a pause,
Shax got so drunk her car she could not stear.
We watched the late film that was on TV,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
(Oi! GR@PH! I'm a HE! Must be my sensitive side you picked up on...Glad to see your arthritis seems better! :mitch:)
We watched the late film that was on TV
But the picture pattern began to go weavey
We watched the late film that was on TV
But the picture pattern began to go weavey
I'm trading the TV in for one that is digital,
We watched the late film that was on TV
But the picture pattern began to go weavey
I'm trading the TV in for one that is digital,
before this one drives me mental!
We watched the late film that was on TV
But the picture pattern began to go weavey
I'm trading the TV in for one that is digital,
before this one drives me mental!
So we got our new digital tv so we going to sit and watch a dvd.
piston broke the mechanic said,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Piston broke, the mechanic said,
Car won't go, I think it's dead.
Piston broke, the mechanic said,
Car won't go, I think it's dead.
Major repairs the mechanic ordered,
Piston broke, the mechanic said,
Car won't go, I think it's dead.
Major repairs the mechanic ordered,
I can use those parts I've long kept hoarded
Piston broke, the mechanic said,
Car won't go, I think it's dead.
Major repairs the mechanic ordered,
I can use those parts I've long kept hoarded
I've have them stored underneath my bed!
Got up from the table and paid the check,
Got up from the table and paid the check,
Stole the crockery and table-cloth, and thought "Oh, what the heck"
Got up from the table and paid the check,
Stole the crockery and table-cloth, and thought "Oh, what the heck"
Police were waiting outside the door,
Got up from the table and paid the check,
Stole the crockery and table-cloth, and thought "Oh, what the heck"
Police were waiting outside the door,
So I went back in and took some more
Got up from the table and paid the check,
Stole the crockery and table-cloth, and thought "Oh, what the heck"
Police were waiting outside the door,
So I went back in and took some more
They drug me out and threw me on the deck!
Warm cold warm cold when will it ever be Spring
Warm cold warm cold when will it ever be Spring,
Can't wait for Robin Redbreast to come back and sing,
Warm cold warm cold when will it ever be Spring,
Can't wait for Robin Redbreast to come back and sing,
Down here in Oz it's Summer, you know
Warm cold warm cold when will it ever be Spring,
Can't wait for Robin Redbreast to come back and sing,
Down here in Oz it's Summer, you know,
With the wind up here, feels like 40 below,
Warm cold warm cold when will it ever be Spring,
Can't wait for Robin Redbreast to come back and sing,
Down here in Oz it's Summer, you know,
With the wind up here, feels like 40 below,
For snow, I'd give anything!
A man from Frog Rock, he did say:
A man from Frog Rock, he did say:
Have you kissed a frog today?
A man from Frog Rock, he did say:
Have you kissed a frog today?
He denied that he had,
A man from Frog Rock, he did say:
Have you kissed a frog today?
He denied that he had,
But that poor old lad,
A man from Frog Rock, he did say:
Have you kissed a frog today?
He denied that he had,
But that poor old lad,
Had a wart on his nose to display.
Lena and GR@PH and R-C,
Lena and GR@PH and R-C,
went out to the club even though it was quite pricey.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Lena and GR@PH and R-C,
went out to the club even though it was quite pricey.
It was GR@PH's turn to buy
Lena and GR@PH and R-C,
went out to the club even though it was quite pricey.
It was GR@PH's turn to buy
When Lena told a little white lie,
Lena and GR@PH and R-C,
went out to the club even though it was quite pricey.
It was GR@PH's turn to buy
When Lena told a little white lie,
Which turned the warm atmosphere icy.
Lena and GR@PH and R-C,
went out to the club even though it was quite pricey.
It was GR@PH's turn to buy
When Lena told a little white lie,
Which turned the warm atmosphere icy.
She said that her real name was not Lena,
She said that her real name was not Lena,
And her avatar couldn't look meaner :laughing:
She said that her real name was not Lena,
And her avatar couldn't look meaner.
Everyone at the table was shocked
She said that her real name was not Lena,
And her avatar couldn't look meaner.
Everyone at the table was shocked
Security checked the doors were locked
She said that her real name was not Lena,
And her avatar couldn't look meaner.
Everyone at the table was shocked
Security checked the doors were locked
A con on the lam, so don't get between her.
She robs banks in the town of Des Moines,
She robs banks in the town of Des Moines,
and always gets away with there moneys.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
She robs banks in the town of Des Moines,
and always gets away with their moneys.
But then came the day
She robs banks in the town of Des Moines,
and always gets away with their moneys.
But then came the day
"America's Most Wanted" would portray
She robs banks in the town of Des Moines,
and always gets away with their moneys.
But then came the day
"America's Most Wanted" would portray
That Lena could not have been meaner.
A hog was trotting down the road,
A hog was trotting down the road,
When mean old Lena jabbed him with her goad,
A hog was trotting down the road,
When mean old Lena jabbed him with her goad.
He squealed through his snout
A hog was trotting down the road,
When mean old Lena jabbed him with her goad.
He squealed through his snout
Witch was heard two miles away by a man drinking a pint of Stout.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
A hog was trotting down the road,
When mean old Lena jabbed him with her goad.
He squealed through his snout
Witch was heard two miles away by a man drinking a pint of Stout.
It scared him so badly he tipped over his cart and dropped his load!
A pinecone falls on a big tin roof
A pinecone falls on a big tin roof
But it was so dry, it just went poof!
A pinecone falls on a big tin roof
But it was so dry, it just went poof!
the squirrel on the roof watched it go poof and sat waiting for another
A pinecone falls on a big tin roof
But it was so dry, it just went poof!
the squirrel on the roof watched it go poof and sat waiting for another
he did not see it but one fell right by his mother.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
A pinecone falls on a big tin roof
But it was so dry, it just went poof!
the squirrel on the roof watched it go poof and sat waiting for another
he did not see it but one fell right by his mother.
Who thought it was a horse's hoof.
It's hard to find an honest man
It's hard to find an honest man
But I'll keep trying as long as I can,
It's hard to find an honest man
But I'll keep trying as long as I can,
Cleaning & polishing to keep our home looking spic and span.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
It's hard to find an honest man
But I'll keep trying as long as I can,
Cleaning & polishing to keep our home looking spic and span.
sure would be nice to just be laying out on the sand!
It's hard to find an honest man
But I'll keep trying as long as I can,
Cleaning & polishing to keep our home looking spic and span.
sure would be nice to just be laying out on the sand!
It is getting warm, need to get out and clean the fans!
The snow is finally melting, in comes the mud.
The snow is finally melting, in comes the mud,
The cleats in my boot are all full of crud,
The snow is finally melting, in comes the mud,
The cleats in my boot are all full of crud,
working up the garden will be next on the list
The snow is finally melting, in comes the mud,
The cleats in my boot are all full of crud,
working up the garden will be next on the list
The mowing, the pruning, what else have I missed?
The snow is finally melting, in comes the mud,
The cleats in my boot are all full of crud,
working up the garden will be next on the list
The mowing, the pruning, what else have I missed?
after all this a beverage or two and a nice soak in the suds!
Young stars dying from overdoses is just so sad
Young stars dying from overdoses is just so sad
But when they influence others, it just makes me mad,
Young stars dying from overdoses is just so sad
But when they influence others, it just makes me mad,
They will always remember those who lost there lives.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Young stars dying from overdoses is just so sad
But when they influence others, it just makes me mad,
They will always remember those who lost there lives.
They should be happy and healthy and so thankful they thrive.
Young stars dying from overdoses is just so sad
But when they influence others, it just makes me mad,
They will always remember those who lost there lives.
They should be happy and healthy and so thankful they thrive.
And hopefully bad habits were just a passing fad.
There was an old lady from Spain,
There was an old lady from Spain,
she was always complaining of her Pain
There was an old lady from Spain,
she was always complaining of her Pain
Then her doctor and a bullfighter
There was an old lady from Spain,
she was always complaining of her Pain
Then her doctor and a bullfighter
Went out for a meal at Beefeater.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
There was an old lady from Spain,
she was always complaining of her Pain
Then her doctor and a bullfighter
Went out for a meal at Beefeater.
And recalled she'd been gored again and again.
When I was turning sweet sixteen,
When I was turning sweet sixteen,
Kissed I'd never been.
When I was turning sweet sixteen,
Kissed I'd never been.
But that soon came to an end.
When I was turning sweet sixteen,
Kissed I'd never been.
But that soon came to an end.
down the end of our road just past the bend.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
When I was turning sweet sixteen,
Kissed I'd never been.
But that soon came to an end.
down the end of our road just past the bend.
by someone who I thought was just a friend.
Sun is shining and the trees are turning green
Sun is shining and the trees are turning green,
"Tis the most beautiful day that I have ever seen,
Sun is shining and the trees are turning green,
"Tis the most beautiful day that I have ever seen,
The birds are feeding on the fresh mown lawn
Sun is shining and the trees are turning green,
"Tis the most beautiful day that I have ever seen,
The birds are feeding on the fresh mown lawn
Along the tree line stands Bambi and her newborn fawn,
Sun is shining and the trees are turning green,
"Tis the most beautiful day that I have ever seen,
The birds are feeding on the fresh mown lawn
Along the tree line stands Bambi and her newborn fawn,
It is all so pretty just like a postcard scene.
Night time silence shattered by the sound of shooting
Night time silence shattered by the sound of shooting
Then windows break and people are looting,
Night time silence shattered by the sound of shooting
Then windows break and people are looting.
Said a Cop, "It's a pity"
Night time silence shattered by the sound of shooting
Then windows break and people are looting.
Said a Cop, "It's a pity"
"No place is safe in this big city",
Night time silence shattered by the sound of shooting
Then windows break and people are looting.
Said a Cop, "It's a pity"
"No place is safe in this big city",
"we need a new Mayor, how about Putin?"
There once was a Sheik of Algiers
There once was a Sheik of Algiers,
Whose mortgage was six months in arrears,
There once was a Sheik of Algiers,
Whose mortgage was six months in arrears.
With four wives and a camel
There once was a Sheik of Algiers,
Whose mortgage was six months in arrears.
With four wives and a camel
He decided he would gamble,
There once was a Sheik of Algiers,
Whose mortgage was six months in arrears.
With four wives and a camel
He decided he would gamble
his childrens inherritance and lost every thing over some beers.
One night twenty four years ago today.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
One night twenty four years ago today.
Our son born too early to our dismay.
One night twenty four years ago today.
Our son born too early to our dismay.
A premie in an incubator,
One night twenty four years ago today.
Our son born too early to our dismay.
A premie in an incubator,
But all was ok a week later.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
One night twenty four years ago today.
Our son born too early to our dismay.
A premie in an incubator,
But all was ok a week later.
Now he is all grow up and out earning his pay.
The fat gray squirrels are scurrying all about.
The fat gray squirrels are scurrying all about.
they are running all over the kids roundabout.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The fat gray squirrels are scurrying all about.
they are running all over the kids roundabout.
As they run their fluffy tails flit about here and there.
The fat gray squirrels are scurrying all about.
they are running all over the kids roundabout.
As they run their fluffy tails flit about here and there,
Trying to find their nuts that they buried somewhere,
The fat gray squirrels are scurrying all about.
they are running all over the kids roundabout.
As they run their fluffy tails flit about here and there,
Trying to find their nuts that they buried somewhere,
But all is well when they remember they left them down the drain spout.
The Easter bunny is getting ready to do his rounds.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The Easter bunny is getting ready to do his rounds.
As he prowls around, being careful to make no sounds.
The Easter bunny is getting ready to do his rounds.
As he prowls around, being careful to make no sounds.
Leaving an Egg here and an egg over there,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The Easter bunny is getting ready to do his rounds.
As he prowls around, being careful to make no sounds.
Leaving an Egg here and an egg over there,
carrying them with such caution and care.
The Easter bunny is getting ready to do his rounds.
As he prowls around, being careful to make no sounds.
Leaving an Egg here and an egg over there,
carrying them with such caution and care.
That was till he tripped over droppioing them on the ground.
Severn little helpers went on there merry way.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Seven little helpers went on there merry way,
Leaving Snow White to clean up the curds and whey,
Seven little helpers went on there merry way,
Leaving Snow White to clean up the curds and whey,
after finishing her chores she laid down for a nap
Seven little helpers went on there merry way,
Leaving Snow White to clean up the curds and whey,
after finishing her chores she laid down for a nap
before waking up by an ugly old lady knocking on her door a rat a tat tap.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Seven little helpers went on there merry way,
Leaving Snow White to clean up the curds and whey,
after finishing her chores she laid down for a nap
before waking up by an ugly old lady knocking on her door a rat a tat tap.
She wanted to tell her that this was going to be her very special day.
Green grass growing, mowers all a buzz
Green grass growing, mowers all a buzz,
at least i not have to cut it any more as that I leave to my cuss.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Green grass growing, mowers all a buzz,
at least i not have to cut it any more as that I leave to my cuss.
The clippings go in the compost heap
Green grass growing, mowers all a buzz,
at least i not have to cut it any more as that I leave to my cuss.
The clippings go in the compost heap
which is getting very very deep!
Green grass growing, mowers all a buzz,
at least i not have to cut it any more as that I leave to my cuss.
The clippings go in the compost heap
which is getting very very deep!
The worms will bring in down in size, 'cause that is what worms does!
(R-C...while you're here, I cannot post in the What Am I use For thread...is it a leather embosser?) :hallo:
Back to limericks...
My password isn't recognised
My password isn't recognised
but then i was only going to plagiarize.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
My password isn't recognised
but then i was only going to plagiarize.
what oh what has caused this confusion.
My password isn't recognised
but then i was only going to plagiarize.
what oh what has caused this confusion.
Perhaps a virus made an intrusion
My password isn't recognised
but then i was only going to plagiarize.
what oh what has caused this confusion.
Perhaps a virus made an intrusion
if it has spread I will have to apologize!
A lizard and a snake sunning on a rock
A lizard and a snake sunning on a rock
A bird flew down, and then the whole flock,
A lizard and a snake sunning on a rock
A bird flew down, and then the whole flock,
Up hopped a bunny to nibble on some grass
A lizard and a snake sunning on a rock
A bird flew down, and then the whole flock,
Up hopped a bunny to nibble on some grass
and the crow flew down to pick up a piece of
glass
A lizard and a snake sunning on a rock
A bird flew down, and then the whole flock,
Up hopped a bunny to nibble on some grass
and the crow flew down to pick up a piece of glass
But got swallowed quickly in the jaws of a croc.
My taxes are due on the fifteenth of April,
My taxes are due on the fifteenth of April,
yet going round the garden centure all I can think about is what is witch tree to go for the Elm or the Maple.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
My taxes are due on the fifteenth of April,
yet going round the garden centure all I can think about is what is witch tree to go for the Elm or the Maple
Hope my return will pay for all this shopping!
My taxes are due on the fifteenth of April,
yet going round the garden centure all I can think about is what is witch tree to go for the Elm or the Maple
Hope my return will pay for all this shopping!
As the bill for it all is jaw dropping.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
My taxes are due on the fifteenth of April,
yet going round the garden centure all I can think about is what is witch tree to go for the Elm or the Maple
Hope my return will pay for all this shopping!
As the bill for it all is jaw dropping.
No longer will caviar be my food staple.
I once had a CD Rom,
I once had a CD Rom,
by a friend of mine called Tom.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
I once had a CD Rom,
by a friend of mine called Tom.
Someone Borrowed it and it never was returned
I once had a CD Rom,
by a friend of mine called Tom.
Someone Borrowed it and it never was returned
A new CD or his arse will get burned,
I once had a CD Rom,
by a friend of mine called Tom.
Someone Borrowed it and it never was returned
A new CD or his arse will get burned,
so i waitng for my new one from e-bay to come.
Does anyone know the way to Santeria,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Does anyone know the way to Santeria
I know a lovely lady from there name Maria
Does anyone know the way to Santeria
I know a lovely lady from there name Maria
Her culinary skills are superb,
Does anyone know the way to Santeria
I know a lovely lady from there name Maria
Her culinary skills are superb,
she adds just a pinch of a secret Herb.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Does anyone know the way to Santeria
I know a lovely lady from there named Maria
Her culinary skills are superb,
She adds just a pinch of a secret Herb
That comes from the wilds of Korea.
This world is full of wondrous things,
This world is full of wondrous things,
A part that is were our old beds springs.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
This world is full of wondrous things,
A part that is were our old beds springs.
One popped up in the middle
This world is full of wondrous things,
A part that is were our old beds springs.
One popped up in the middle
And I shouted "Hey Diddle Diddle"
This world is full of wondrous things,
A part that is were our old beds springs.
One popped up in the middle
And I shouted "Hey Diddle Diddle"
So new bed is on its way as the company said that they will brings.
Update this and update that,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Update this and update that,
I would rather just be playing at bat.
Update this and update that,
I would rather just be playing at bat.
But my computer's running slow,
Update this and update that,
I would rather just be playing at bat.
But my computer's running slow,
whilst i get my cup o' joe
Update this and update that,
I would rather just be playing at bat.
But my computer's running slow,
whilst i get my cup o' joe
It is scanning now all of my data.
Can you do the quick step,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Can you do the quick step,
Or have you run out of pep?
Can you do the quick step,
Or have you run out of pep?
Dancing all night long,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Can you do the quick step,
Or have you run out of pep?
Dancing all night long,
To the lyrics of a song,
Can you do the quick step,
Or have you run out of pep?
Dancing all night long,
To the lyrics of a song,
and off my feet I was swept!
The leaves are dancing in the breeze
The leaves are dancing in the breeze,
But that darn pollen makes me sneeze,
The leaves are dancing in the breeze,
But that darn pollen makes me sneeze,
It's Hay fever I have that makes me wheeze.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The leaves are dancing in the breeze,
But that darn pollen makes me sneeze,
It's Hay fever I have that makes me wheeze.
ah-choo! if you please.
The leaves are dancing in the breeze,
But that darn pollen makes me sneeze,
It's Hay fever I have that makes me wheeze.
ah-choo! if you please.
But it better in the winter the only problem is I freeze.
Eatting an apple a day is said to keep the doctor away,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Eatting an apple a day is said to keep the doctor away,
But I'd rather eat a banana to keep the leg cramps at bay,
Eating an apple a day is said to keep the doctor away,
But I'd rather eat a banana to keep the leg cramps at bay,
Thats two of my five daily fruits eaten already today,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Eating an apple a day is said to keep the doctor away,
But I'd rather eat a banana to keep the leg cramps at bay,
Thats two of my five daily fruits eaten already today,
thankfully fruits will be more plentiful since we are already in May.
Eating an apple a day is said to keep the doctor away,
But I'd rather eat a banana to keep the leg cramps at bay,
Thats two of my five daily fruits eaten already today,
thankfully fruits will be more plentiful since we are already in May.
And there are always lots of nuts here at LandzDown, Hurray!!
The little old lady once said to a fly,
The little old lady once said to a fly,
I see your little footprints on my pie!
The little old lady once said to a fly,
I see your little footprints on my pie!
"They might LOOK like mine,
The little old lady once said to a fly,
I see your little footprints on my pie!
"They might LOOK like mine,
But many others came to dine,
The little old lady once said to a fly,
I see your little footprints on my pie!
"They might LOOK like mine,
But many others came to dine,
and enjoy there meal before they die.
It's hot and sunny again tempiture hit 27c today here in England
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
It's hot and sunny again temperature hit 27c today here in England,
But back in the States we had so much lightening, it left my ears a'tinglin',
It's hot and sunny again temperature hit 27c today here in England,
But back in the States we had so much lightening, it left my ears a'tinglin',
Slapping on the total sun block as ordered by my Doc,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
It's hot and sunny again temperature hit 27c today here in England,
But back in the States we had so much lightening, it left my ears a'tinglin',
Slapping on the total sun block as ordered by my Doc,
My skin is so wrinkled, I look like a croc,
It's hot and sunny again temperature hit 27c today here in England,
But back in the States we had so much lightening, it left my ears a'tinglin',
Slapping on the total sun block as ordered by my Doc,
My skin is so wrinkled, I look like a croc,
and to top it all of I now have swolen glands.
World cup footie is set to start
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
World cup footie is set to start
It's not just a sport; more like an art.
World cup footie is set to start
It's not just a sport; more like an art.
If you like I am not into football,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
World cup footie is set to start
It's not just a sport; more like an art.
If you like I am not into football,
Rather have a beer in a mug a foot tall,
World cup footie is set to start
It's not just a sport; more like an art.
If you like I am not into football,
Rather have a beer in a mug a foot tall,
then sit back and watch my Grandson race his go-cart.
Are we all in a good mood on this fine sunny day,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Are we all in a good mood on this fine sunny day,
such a beautiful day just makes me want to go out and play.
Are we all in a good mood on this fine sunny day,
such a beautiful day just makes me want to go out and play.
one of the games we like to play is tennis,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Are we all in a good mood on this fine sunny day,
such a beautiful day just makes me want to go out and play.
one of the games we like to play is tennis,
but I can never beat my friend Dennis.
Are we all in a good mood on this fine sunny day,
such a beautiful day just makes me want to go out and play.
one of the games we like to play is tennis,
but I can never beat my friend Dennis,
When he shows up, I just run away.
I walked by the pond and my cellphone dove in,
I walked by the pond and my cellphone dove in,
all the way down right to it's brim.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
I walked by the pond and my cellphone dove in,
all the way down right to it's brim.
Tried to make a call, but the battery had died,
I walked by the pond and my cellphone dove in,
all the way down right to it's brim.
Tried to make a call, but the battery had died,
still no better once it had dried.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
I walked by the pond and my cellphone dove in,
all the way down right to it's brim.
Tried to make a call, but the battery had died,
still no better once it had dried.
So it hurled it in the corner, straight into the bin.
In Anagalapura, the place I now call home,
In Anagalapura, the place I now call home,
The road are so crowded, it's hard for me to roam,
In Anagalapura, the place I now call home,
The road are so crowded, it's hard for me to roam,
if only telleportation was avaiable,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
In Anagalapura, the place I now call home,
The roads are so crowded, it's hard for me to roam,
If only teleportation was available,
And if a 3-wheeled cab was ever hail-able,
In Anagalapura, the place I now call home,
The roads are so crowded, it's hard for me to roam,
If only teleportation was available,
And if a 3-wheeled cab was ever hail-able,
I'd be travellin' instead of sittin' here writing this poem.
There once was a snake who lived under the barn,
There once was a snake who lived under the barn
the famers wife thought that it was an old pice of yarn.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
There once was a snake who lived under the barn
the famers wife thought that it was an old pice of yarn.
Till the day it reared it's ugly head
There once was a snake who lived under the barn.
The farmer's wife thought that it was an old piece of yarn.
Till the day it reared its ugly head,
Opened its mouth, and this is what it said:
There once was a snake who lived under the barn.
The farmer's wife thought that it was an old piece of yarn.
Till the day it reared its ugly head,
Opened its mouth, and this is what it said:
"I can't h.i.s.s.t.h without a l.i.s.s.p.t.h worth a darn".
If I were rich, I'd stop being frugal,
If I were rich, I'd stop being frugal,
And learn to play the bugle.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
If I were rich, I'd stop being frugal,
And learn to play the bugle.
The neighbours won't complain about the sound
If I were rich, I'd stop being frugal,
And learn to play the bugle.
The neighbours won't complain about the sound
Like the Pied Piper, they'd all come around,
If I were rich, I'd stop being frugal,
And learn to play the bugle.
The neighbours won't complain about the sound.
Like the Pied Piper, they'd all come around,
And playing bagpipes would be Dougall.
Not last night, but the night before,
Not last night, but the night before,
I was sure that I had heard some one at my door.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Not last night, but the night before,
I was sure that I had heard some one at my door,
the knock was brief,
Not last night, but the night before,
I was sure that I had heard some one at my door,
the knock was brief,
I quietly waited hoping it was not a thief.
Not last night, but the night before,
I was sure that I had heard some one at my door,
the knock was brief,
I quietly waited hoping it was not a thief.
It was only Phoo bear and his trusted friend eeyore.
Out on the town late Friday night,
GR@PH;<'S
Out on the town late Friday night,
I bumped into GR@PH, and wasn't he a sight!
Out on the town late Friday night,
I bumped into GR@PH, and wasn't he a sight!
With a beer in each hand,
Out on the town late Friday night,
I bumped into GR@PH, and wasn't he a sight!
With a beer in each hand,
just as he had planned.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Out on the town late Friday night,
I bumped into GR@PH, and wasn't he a sight!
With a beer in each hand,
Just as he had planned,
He never dropped one, he was squeezing them so tight!
I've got a really sore tooth and a flat tyre on my bike,
I've got a really sore tooth and a flat tyre on my bike,
So going to the dentist means I'll just have to hike,
I've got a really sore tooth and a flat tyre on my bike,
So going to the dentist means I'll just have to hike,
had my tooth filled and my tire replaced,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
I've got a really sore tooth and a flat tyre on my bike,
So going to the dentist means I'll just have to hike,
had my tooth filled and my tire replaced,
but when I got the bill, I was really red-faced,
I've got a really sore tooth and a flat tyre on my bike,
So going to the dentist means I'll just have to hike,
had my tooth filled and my tire replaced,
but when I got the bill, I was really red-faced,
But just wait till I have to tell Mike!
The days are long and scalding hot!
The days are long and scalding hot!
A bad case of sun poisoning is what I got,
The days are long and scalding hot!
A bad case of sun poisoning is what I got,
But all is ok now thanks to the pharmacist,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The days are long and scalding hot!
A bad case of sun poisoning is what I got,
But all is ok now thanks to the pharmacist,
The calamine lotion will soothe the itch,
The days are long and scalding hot!
A bad case of sun poisoning is what I got,
But all is ok now thanks to the pharmacist,
The calamine lotion will soothe the itch,
Cool but miserable, I'm a such a sot!
I went shopping yesterday to see,
I went shopping yesterday to see,
What's on SALE for a gal like me,
I went shopping yesterday to see,
What's on SALE for a gal like me,
Just this second go home,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
I went shopping yesterday to see,
What's on SALE for a gal like me,
Just this second got home,
With my precious new purchase, a smiling garden gnome.
I went shopping yesterday to see,
What's on SALE for a gal like me,
Just this second got home,
With my precious new purchase, a smiling garden gnome.
Now sorry but got to go to the loo for a pee.
Just this minuet set the table for our dinner party.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Just this minute set the table for our dinner party.
The meal we'll serve is hale and hearty.
Just this minute set the table for our dinner party.
The meal we'll serve is hale and hearty.
All the guests arrive by seven,
Just this minute set the table for our dinner party.
The meal we'll serve is hale and hearty.
All the guests arrive by seven,
I can hardly wait the food smells like heaven.
Just this minute set the table for our dinner party.
The meal we'll serve is hale and hearty.
All the guests arrive by seven,
I can hardly wait the food smells like heaven
then we went out side for a spot of artery
The night started out very windy and wet
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The night started out very windy and wet
A strange calm came down as we got set.
The night started out very windy and wet
A strange calm came down as we got set.
Then the thunder srated witch we just know was in for the night,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The night started out very windy and wet
A strange calm came down as we got set.
Then the thunder started which we just knew was in for the night,
The Landzdown folk I was partying with, they really got a fright
The night started out very windy and wet
A strange calm came down as we got set.
Then the thunder started which we just knew was in for the night,
The Landzdown folk I was partying with, they really got a fright
after that most went home apart form a few of us who just wanted to watch so the three of us just sat.
The night is so humid here to night.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The night is so humid here to night.
The curls in my hair are no longer tight,
The night is so humid here to night.
The curls in my hair are no longer tight,
My fresh pressed clothes are quite limp,
The night is so humid here to night.
The curls in my hair are no longer tight,
My fresh pressed clothes are quite limp,
Making me look like the Goodyear blimp.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The night is so humid here to night.
The curls in my hair are no longer tight,
My fresh pressed clothes are quite limp,
Making me look like the Goodyear blimp
That's just had its first trans-Atlantic flight.
There's a saying in Australia, that all the locals use
There's a saying in Australia, that all the locals use
About the Land Down Under, the women, the booze,
There's a saying in Australia, that all the locals use,
About the Land Down Under, the women, the booze.
The stars at night, the Vegemite,
There's a saying in Australia, that all the locals use,
About the Land Down Under, the women, the booze.
The stars at night, the Vegemite,
witch ofcause those poms call Marmite.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
There's a saying in Australia, that all the locals use,
About the Land Down Under, the women and the booze.
The stars at night, the Vegemite,
Which of course those Poms call Marmite.
And who could forget the kangaroos?
George W. Bush was a bit of a nerd.
George W. Bush was a bit of a nerd.
He was President but no one cared.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
George W. Bush was a bit of a nerd.
He was President but no one cared.
the new one of course...
George W. Bush was a bit of a nerd.
He was President but no one cared.
the new one of course...
has never served a day in our military force
George W. Bush was a bit of a nerd.
He was President but no one cared.
the new one of course...
has never served a day in our military force
Bu hay he dose like lemon curd
You just do not know witch way the wind will blow.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
You just do not know witch way the wind will blow.
But pull up the sail, matey, I'm anxious to go,
You just do not know witch way the wind will blow.
But pull up the sail, matey, I'm anxious to go,
Tacking this way then that,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
You just do not know witch way the wind will blow.
But pull up the sail, matey, I'm anxious to go,
Tacking this way then that,
better hang on to your hat!
You just do not know witch way the wind will blow.
But pull up the sail, matey, I'm anxious to go,
Tacking this way then that,
better hang on to your hat!
If the wind rips the sails, we'll all have to row.
Temps are getting lower, this morning I saw frost,
Temps are getting lower, this morning I saw frost,
Now I know my car will just Rust.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Temps are getting lower, this morning I saw frost,
Now I know my car will just Rust.
Every morning I find all the windows are wet,
Temps are getting lower, this morning I saw frost,
Now I know my car will just Rust.
Every morning I find all the windows are wet,
Having to go out side to Do her Tree-Mail's I feel sorry for our pet.
(Just in case dog tree-mails :laughing:)
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Temps are getting lower, this morning I saw frost,
Now I know my car will just Rust.
Every morning I find all the windows are wet,
Having to go out side to Do her Tree-Mail's I feel sorry for our pet.
Freezing cold toes and lots of shivering were the cost!
Four cute kittens sitting out side my door.
Four cute kittens sitting out side my door,
If I put out some milk, there will probably be more,
Four cute kittens sitting out side my door,
If I put out some milk, there will probably be more,
oh yes indeed but not only cats, there were coons, possums and a fluffy black skunk!
Four cute kittens sitting out side my door,
If I put out some milk, there will probably be more,
oh yes indeed but not only cats, there were coons, possums and a fluffy black skunk!
but best of all was a five foot tall munk.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Four cute kittens sitting out side my door,
If I put out some milk, there will probably be more,
oh yes indeed but not only cats, there were coons, possums and a fluffy black skunk!
but best of all was a five foot tall munk.
Feeding so many will make me poor!
The chill is in the air
The chill is in the air
And it's snowing everywhere,
The chill is in the air
And it's snowing everywhere.
But just as it's starting to thaw,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The chill is in the air
And it's snowing everywhere.
But just as it's starting to thaw,
down came more
Netty. :hammy:
The chill is in the air
And it's snowing everywhere.
But just as it's starting to thaw,
down came more
and all I could do was to stare.
Oh joy only sixteen sleeps to Christmas
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Oh joy only sixteen sleeps to Christmas
All the worrying 'bout shopping made me listless
Oh joy only sixteen sleeps to Christmas
All the worrying 'bout shopping made me listless
Now all the gift's have arrived thanks to internet shopping,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Oh joy only sixteen sleeps to Christmas
All the worrying 'bout shopping made me listless
Now all the gift's have arrived thanks to internet shopping,
But until the stores close, I'm not stopping,
Oh joy only sixteen sleeps to Christmas
All the worrying 'bout shopping made me listless
Now all the gift's have arrived thanks to internet shopping,
But until the stores close, I'm not stopping,
Not until the start of Christmas mass.
Lena has nearly maxed out her entire purse of credit cards,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Lena has nearly maxed out her entire purse of credit cards,
So they went through the shredder into a pile of plastic shards,
Lena has nearly maxed out her entire purse of credit cards,
So they went through the shredder into a pile of plastic shards
But all was well when her Husband handed her all of his to go use,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Lena has nearly maxed out her entire purse of credit cards,
So they went through the shredder into a pile of plastic shards
But all was well when her Husband handed her all of his to go use,
when he gets the bill he may not be amused!
Lena has nearly maxed out her entire purse of credit cards,
So they went through the shredder into a pile of plastic shards
But all was well when her Husband handed her all of his to go use,
when he gets the bill he may not be amused!
Unless that is the bills fall behind the kitchen cupboards
Just been told s going to get realy cold,
GR@PH<'S :Hammys pint:
Just been told s going to get realy cold,
it makes my joints hurt and I feel so old!
Just been told s going to get realy cold,
it makes my joints hurt and I feel so old!
But I'll put on the long johns and grab my parka,
Just been told s going to get realy cold,
it makes my joints hurt and I feel so old!
But I'll put on the long johns and grab my parka,
But i will remember to take a torch today as it is getting much darker.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Just been told s going to get realy cold,
it makes my joints hurt and I feel so old!
But I'll put on the long johns and grab my parka,
But i will remember to take a torch today as it is getting much darker.
For the walk home from the pub, so I don't get rolled.
The mistletoe is hanging, but no one's standing under,
The mistletoe is hanging, but no one's standing under,
Think thats due to what happened last year with you know who and Steve the boy wonder.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The mistletoe is hanging, but no one's standing under,
Think thats due to what happened last year with you know who and Steve the boy wonder.
But when the booze starts flowin', everyone will start kissin'
The mistletoe is hanging, but no one's standing under,
Think thats due to what happened last year with you know who and Steve the boy wonder.
But when the booze starts flowin', everyone will start kissin'
until they realize that Santa's missing.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The mistletoe is hanging, but no one's standing under,
Think thats due to what happened last year with you know who and Steve the boy wonder.
But when the booze starts flowin', everyone will start kissin'
until they realize that Santa's missing.
So they tracked him on NORAD and found him over yonder.
Presents have all been opened and wrapping paper strewn all over,
Presents have all been opened and wrapping paper strewn all over,
I see mother got me another Christmas pullover.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
who woke in a terrible fright
Presents have all been opened and wrapping paper strewn all over,
I see mother got me another Christmas pullover.
who woke in a terrible fright
thinking the pullover would fit too tight,
Presents have all been opened and wrapping paper strewn all over,
I see mother got me another Christmas pullover.
who woke in a terrible fright
thinking the pullover would fit too tight,
When she saw that it was, she gave it to Rover.
Cookies, pies and other goodies,
Cookies, pies and other goodies,
All eaten by Buzz Lightyear, that friend of Woody's,
stuffed, his flying now over,
Cookies, pies and other goodies,
All eaten by Buzz Lightyear, that friend of Woody's,
stuffed, his flying now over,
Still thinking of that near miss as WI flow over Dover.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Cookies, pies and other goodies,
All eaten by Buzz Lightyear, that friend of Woody's,
stuffed, his flying now over,
Still thinking of that near miss as WI flow over Dover.
burping to all, 'a good night!'
rudolph the red knows rain, dear,
rudolph the red knows rain, dear,
Had a little accident after running off the end of Blackpool pier.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Rudolph the red knows rain, dear,
Had a little accident after running off the end of Blackpool pier.
He must have stayed too long at the pub,
Rudolph the red knows rain, dear,
Had a little accident after running off the end of Blackpool pier.
He must have stayed too long at the pub,
When Dancer quit dancing, gave him a back rub,
Rudolph the red knows rain, dear,
Had a little accident after running off the end of Blackpool pier.
He must have stayed too long at the pub,
When Dancer quit dancing, gave him a back rub,
Know this, when rain dear dance it is from good cheer.
However when Reindeer dance,
however, when reindeer dance,
their mates go into a trance,
however, when reindeer dance,
their mates go into a trance,
they can't pull a sleigh,
however, when reindeer dance,
their mates go into a trance,
they can't pull a sleigh,
Know mater how many times santa prays.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
however, when reindeer dance,
their mates go into a trance,
they can't pull a sleigh,
Know mater how many times santa prays.
But oh how they do love to prance.
It was a dark and dreary day
It was a dark and dreary day
When my Chihuahua ran away,
It was a dark and dreary day
When my Chihuahua ran away
But all is well now his back home.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
It was a dark and dreary day
When my Chihuahua ran away
But all is well now, he's back home.
Needs a shampoo, needs a comb
It was a dark and dreary day
When my Chihuahua ran away
But all is well now, he's back home.
Needs a shampoo, needs a comb
Now it knows where it better stay!
Lots of snow up North
Lots of snow up North,
Every day this week since the fourth,
Lots of snow up North,
Every day this week since the fourth,
Ugh, with more on the way!
Lots of snow up North,
Every day this week since the fourth,
Ugh, with more on the way!
Here in Houston just rain every day.
Lots of snow up North,
Every day this week since the fourth,
Ugh, with more on the way!
Here in Houston just rain every day,
Certainly Global Warming is the source.
I thought I'd take the day off and go fishin',
I thought I'd take the day off and go fishin',
A big ole fish is what I'm wishin'.
I thought I'd take the day off and go fishin',
A big ole fish is what I'm wishin'.
I think I got a bite,
I thought I'd take the day off and go fishin',
A big ole fish is what I'm wishin'.
I think I got a bite,
then I fell in i looked a right sight.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
I thought I'd take the day off and go fishin',
A big ole fish is what I'm wishin'.
I think I got a bite,
then I fell in i looked a right sight.
Now that fried fish I will be missin!
The chores are calling me but a nap is more appealing
The chores are calling me but a nap is more appealing
My eyelids are heavy and I have a feeling.
The chores are calling me but a nap is more appealing
My eyelids are heavy and I have a feeling.
I'll doze on the recliner for just a few minutes,
The chores are calling me but a nap is more appealing.
My eyelids are heavy and I have a feeling
I'll doze on the recliner for just a few minutes,
I'm just so lazy, it's really a sin, it's
The chores are calling me but a nap is more appealing.
My eyelids are heavy and I have a feeling
I'll doze on the recliner for just a few minutes,
I'm just so lazy, it's really a sin, it's
nearly time for me to make the dinner yuk just thought I better get peeling.
"Scone or tea cake with your elevenses my dear" said Netty.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
"Scone or tea cake with your elevenses my dear" said Netty.
(She hoped I say 'Scone' 'cause the tea cake wasn't ready),
"Scone or tea cake with your elevenses my dear" said Netty.
(She hoped I say 'Scone' 'cause the tea cake wasn't ready),
Do you think GR@PH;<'S is just thinking about his belly.
Netty.(https://www.landzdown.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi975.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fae234%2Fmustpb%2FSkype%2520emoticons%2Femoticon-0127-lipssealed.gif&hash=45469cbc7d4e762ac0ed42ddd0f57880251b103b)
"Scone or tea cake with your elevenses my dear" said Netty.
(She hoped I say 'Scone' 'cause the tea cake wasn't ready),
Do you think GR@PH;<'S is just thinking about his belly.
While he sits in the living room watching telly.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
"Scone or tea cake with your elevenses my dear" said Netty.
(She hoped I say 'Scone' 'cause the tea cake wasn't ready),
Do you think GR@PH;<'S is just thinking about his belly.
While he sits in the living room watching telly,
And dozes off quickly while hugging his teddy.
There once was a banker who had a great wife,
There once was a banker who had a great wife,
Although sometimes she caused him great strife
There once was a banker who had a great wife,
Although sometimes she caused him great strife.
While counting the money he had in his safe,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
There once was a banker who had a great wife,
Although sometimes she caused him great strife.
While counting the money he had in his safe,
in walked his security guard Jake.
There once was a banker who had a great wife,
Although sometimes she caused him great strife.
While counting the money he had in his safe,
in walked his security guard Jake,
Pistol in hand, demanded the money or his life.
The banker complied, but his wife rushed in,
The banker complied, but his wife rushed in,
She bonked the robber rught on the noggin'!
The banker complied, but his wife rushed in,
She bonked the robber rught on the noggin'!
and said i hope its not me your on for snoggin
Netty.
The banker complied, but his wife rushed in,
She bonked the robber rught on the noggin'!
and said i hope its not me your on for snoggin
'cause my head's an achin'
The banker complied, but his wife rushed in,
She bonked the robber rught on the noggin'!
and said i hope its not me your on for snoggin
'cause my head's an achin'
I'm still cookin' bacon,
@Lena seems as if you forgot to start the next Limerick so I will post for you. :flowers:
In a land that time forgot mystical creature roamed at night.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
In a land that time forgot mystical creature roamed at night.
if you go out at night you'll mystically get a fright.
Netty.(https://www.landzdown.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fsmileys.smileycentral.com%2Fcat%2F36%2F36_2_39.gif&hash=de9c7ba9049e7fafadeed5ef0a6ac540b89a7c51)
In a land that time forgot mystical creature roamed at night.
if you go out at night you'll mystically get a fright.
So till it is dawn stay inside in the warm,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
In a land that time forgot mystical creature roamed at night.
if you go out at night you'll mystically get a fright.
So till it is dawn stay inside in the warm,
Or you might find that you got a bite!
(https://www.landzdown.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.topnews.in%2Ffiles%2Fdinosaur.jpg&hash=a09b83fdc40f5aecefc09b36c30bc5fbdd99fb64)
In a house with a beautiful kitchen, lived a mouse who was pleadingly wishin',
In a house with a beautiful kitchen, lived a mouse who was pleadingly wishin',
That his mother let him go with his brother and do some fishin.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
In a house with a beautiful kitchen, lived a mouse who was pleadingly wishin',
That his mother let him go with his brother and do some fishin.
So she gave him a worm,
In a house with a beautiful kitchen, lived a mouse who was pleadingly wishin',
That his mother let him go with his brother and do some fishin.
So she gave him a worm,
For him to use in stead as he was using corn.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
In a house with a beautiful kitchen, lived a mouse who was pleadingly wishin',
That his mother let him go with his brother and do some fishin.
So she gave him a worm,
For him to use in stead as he was using corn.
But alas, his tackle box was missin'.
There once was a baker from Boston,
There once was a baker from Boston,
Who upon tact he was continually "lost on".
There once was a baker from Boston,
Who upon tact he was continually "lost on".
He made cakes for the peopleof Arlington Street,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
There once was a baker from Boston,
Who upon tact he was continually "lost on".
He made cakes for the people of Arlington Street,
Those treats were tasty but he wasn't as sweet,
There once was a baker from Boston,
Who upon tact he was continually "lost on".
He made cakes for the people of Arlington Street,
Those treats were tasty but he wasn't as sweet,
he never has any go rotton.
Emma drove her car stright in to the sea,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Emma drove her car straight in to the sea,
'Cause her Garmin miscalculated where she should be,
Emma drove her car straight in to the sea,
'Cause her Garmin miscalculated where she should be,
She distinctly heard,
Emma drove her car straight in to the sea,
'Cause her Garmin miscalculated where she should be,
She distinctly heard,
She heard the sat nav say not the first or second exit but to take the third.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Emma drove her car straight in to the sea,
'Cause her Garmin miscalculated where she should be,
She distinctly heard,
She heard the sat nav say not the first or second exit but to take the third.
She quickly veered to follow and crashed into a tree.
The leaves were falling like rain from the trees
**a quick reminder from page one of this thread
A limerick is a five line poem.
The first two lines rhyme.
Lines 3 and 4 rhyme but not with the first two.
The last line rhymes with the first two lines.
The leaves were falling like rain from the trees
While farmer Joe was harvesting his crop of pea's.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The leaves were falling like rain from the trees
While farmer Joe was harvesting his crop of pea's.
A large flock of ducks floated lazily on the pond.
The leaves were falling like rain from the trees
While farmer Joe was harvesting his crop of pea's.
A large flock of ducks floated lazily on the pond.
Then they waddled past us on the sand
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The leaves were falling like rain from the trees
While farmer Joe was harvesting his crop of pea's.
A large flock of ducks floated lazily on the pond.
Then they waddled past us on the sand
Then one spoke, and I was quickly set to ill-ease... :confused:
The night was alight with the sounds of marsupials
(remember to make it rhyme) :muahaha:
The night was alight with the sounds of marsupials
schooling them we soon lost sight of some o there pupils.
GR@PH;'S :Hammys pint:
The night was alight with the sounds of marsupials
schooling them we soon lost sight of some of their pupils.
They all fell asleep,
The night was alight with the sounds of marsupials
schooling them we soon lost sight of some of their pupils.
They all fell asleep,
But one started to weep,
The night was alight with the sounds of marsupials
schooling them we soon lost sight of some of their pupils.
They all fell asleep,
But one started to weep,
it meant we had no sleep ended up having a couple of headache capsules
I brught a printer that pints to disk.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
I bought a printer that pints to disk.
Hopefully that is not a big risk.
I bought a printer that pints to disk.
Hopefully that is not a big risk.
done one of Johns wedding,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
I bought a printer that prints to disk.
Hopefully that is not a big risk.
Done one of Johns wedding,
And the honeymoon bedding,
I bought a printer that prints to disk.
Hopefully that is not a big risk.
Done one of Johns wedding,
And the honeymoon bedding,
honeymoon over wonder if the border guards will let me through of will they frisk.
The Wedding went ahead as planned.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
the wedding went ahead as planned,
but the groom position went unmanned.
the wedding went ahead as planned,
but the groom position went unmanned.
Never one to be out done,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The wedding went ahead as planned,
But the groom position went unmanned.
Never one to be out done,
She went to find the perfect one
The wedding went ahead as planned,
But the groom position went unmanned.
Never one to be out done,
She went to find the perfect one,
Not one was found in all her land.
As TV program go it is one of the best,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
As TV program go it is one of the best,
Stayed up watching and got no rest,
As TV program go it is one of the best,
Stayed up watching and got no rest,
Typical they repeating it this afternoon,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
As TV program go it is one of the best,
Stayed up watching and got no rest,
Typical they repeating it this afternoon,
Hopefully there will be a winner announced soon.
As TV program go it is one of the best,
Stayed up watching and got no rest,
Typical they repeating it this afternoon,
Hopefully there will be a winner announced soon.
Unless the culprit's already confessed.
My favourite food is Indian curry.
My favourite food is Indian curry.
If I eat it I must find the facilities in a hurry!
My favourite food is Indian curry.
If I eat it I must find the facilities in a hurry!
but thats not an option while she's dating Bill Murry,
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
My favourite food is Indian curry.
If I eat it I must find the facilities in a hurry!
but thats not an option while she's dating Bill Murry,
So sit real still and don't you worry. (AABBA? :sos:)
My favourite food is Indian curry.
If I eat it I must find the facilities in a hurry!
but thats not an option while she's dating Bill Murry,
So sit real still and don't you worry.
What goes in hot comes out hot with a fury.
My router has done let me down,
What goes in hot comes out with a flurry! :flowers:
Edited out as Lena has started one :flowers:
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
My router has done let me down
just hoping my mobile signal is still sound.
@Shax sorry but Lena has started as she finished the last one :flowers:
@Lena Hope you get sorted soon :sos:
good when there working a pain when they don't :muahaha:
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
My router has done let me down
just hoping my mobile signal is still sound.
Verizon won't fix it,
My router has done let me down
just hoping my mobile signal is still sound.
Verizon won't fix it,
So I sitting down calmly having a biscuit.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
My router has done let me down
just hoping my mobile signal is still sound.
Verizon won't fix it,
So I sitting down calmly having a biscuit.
Until a solution is found.
Whenever I open the door,
Whenever I open the door,
Just the sight of you sitting there makes my jaw drop to the floor.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Whenever I open the door,
Just the sight of you sitting there makes my jaw drop to the floor.
So I step on my lip,
Whenever I open the door,
Just the sight of you sitting there makes my jaw drop to the floor.
So I step on my lip,
While out walking but that makes me trip.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Whenever I open the door,
Just the sight of you sitting there makes my jaw drop to the floor.
So I step on my lip,
While out walking but that makes me trip.
Oh golly now my lip is sore!
The heat is in the triple digits.
The heat is in the triple digits.
One hundred and four degrees is making some fidget.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The heat is in the triple digits.
One hundred and four degrees is making some fidget.
Trees are brown instead of green
The heat is in the triple digits.
One hundred and four degrees is making some fidget.
Trees are brown instead of green
Something the likes of me have never seen.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The heat is in the triple digits.
One hundred and four degrees is making some fidget.
Trees are brown instead of green
Something the likes of me have never seen.
And now I can't sell my widgets.
An embarrassing coincidence occurred the other day
An embarrassing coincidence occurred the other day
while I was preparing Santa's Slay.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
An embarrassing coincidence occurred the other day
while I was preparing Santa's Slay.
As I polished the brass rails I cut my self on a nail.
An embarrassing coincidence occurred the other day
while I was preparing Santa's Slay.
As I polished the brass rails I cut my self on a nail.
Apparently I went quite pale.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
An embarrassing coincidence occurred the other day
while I was preparing Santa's Slay.
As I polished the brass rails I cut my self on a nail.
Apparently I went quite pale.
But I managed to the tears at bay.
I've been gone for quite sometime,
I've been gone for quite sometime,
Not knowing that there had been a crime.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
I've been gone for quite sometime,
Not knowing that there had been a crime.
I asked my friends what did I miss?
I've been gone for quite sometime,
Not knowing that there had been a crime.
I asked my friends what did I miss?
Just the whole calss giving miss an end of year kiss.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
I've been gone for quite sometime,
Not knowing that there had been a crime.
I asked my friends what did I miss?
Just the whole calss giving miss an end of year kiss.
Oh really now just where is mine?
While camping on the river bank
While camping on the river bank,
we pitched our text next to a right plank.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
While camping on the river bank,
We pitched our tent right next to a plank.
One end of the plank hung over the water
While camping on the river bank,
We pitched our tent right next to a plank.
One end of the plank hung over the water
needless to say someone fell in, it was my daughter!
While camping on the river bank,
We pitched our tent right next to a plank.
One end of the plank hung over the water
needless to say someone fell in, it was my daughter!
And she says she only jumped in for a prank.
Four short month till Christmas will be here.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Four short month till Christmas will be here.
The shopping malls cause me a lot of fear!
Four short month till Christmas will be here.
The shopping malls cause me a lot of fear!
So one thing a lot do is reach for a beer.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Four short month till Christmas will be here.
The shopping malls cause me a lot of fear!
So one thing a lot do is reach for a beer.
UGH and Oh the Grinch said with a sneer!
Four short month till Christmas will be here.
The shopping malls cause me a lot of fear!
So one thing a lot do is reach for a beer.
UGH and Oh the Grinch said with a sneer!
trying to steer while drinking his beer
I said it once some time ago but I sure it is trying to snow.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
I said it once some time ago but I sure it is trying to snow.
I believe you are right, as the has begun to blow.
I said it once some time ago but I sure it is trying to snow.
I believe you are right, as the has begun to blow.
Where's the sun with all of it's warm glow.
I said it once some time ago but I sure it is trying to snow.
I believe you are right, as the has begun to blow.
Where's the sun with all of it's warm glow.
I don't know, but the temperature is far below.
I said it once some time ago but I sure it is trying to snow.
I believe you are right, as the has begun to blow.
Where's the sun with all of it's warm glow.
I don't know, but the temperature is far below.
well for got to put on my willies and so I stubbed my big toe.
In less than a week the year will be at a end.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
In less than a week the year will be at a end.
New luck this year, and for hubby to mend.
In less than a week the year will be at a end.
New luck this year, and for hubby to mend.
Santa's helpers delivered the wrong present again this year.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
In less than a week the year will be at a end.
New luck this year, and for hubby to mend.
Santa's helpers delivered the wrong present again this year.
Me thinks they sneaked and had a little too much beer?
In less than a week the year will be at a end.
New luck this year, and for hubby to mend.
Santa's helpers delivered the wrong present again this year.
Me thinks they sneaked and had a little too much beer?
And we all ended up a round the bend.
Valentines day is approaching fast
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Valentines day is approaching fast
Heart shaped candies are already cast.
Valentines day is approaching fast
Heart shaped candies are already cast.
Already ordered the a dozen red roses for my loved one.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Valentines day is approaching fast
Heart shaped candies are already cast.
Already ordered the a dozen red roses for my loved one.
But my ordering you see is yet to be done.
Valentines day is approaching fast
Heart shaped candies are already cast.
Already ordered the a dozen red roses for my loved one.
But my ordering you see is yet to be done.
So if I go now at least I will not be last.
One banana two banana three banana four.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
One banana two banana three banana four.
Ouch, I shut my big toe in the door.
One banana two banana three banana four.
Ouch, I shut my big toe in the door.
then later I stubbed the other big toe on our flagstone floor.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
One banana two banana three banana four.
Ouch, I shut my big toe in the door.
then later I stubbed the other big toe on our flagstone floor.
I am getting really tired of this toe hurting bore.
One banana two banana three banana four.
Ouch, I shut my big toe in the door.
then later I stubbed the other big toe on our flagstone floor.
I am getting really tired of this toe hurting bore.
looks as if I will loose it so in stead of five toes i'll only have four.
My new motherboards coming tomorrow.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
My new motherboards coming tomorrow
the old one has been causing such sorrow.
My new motherboards coming tomorrow
the old one has been causing such sorrow
Crashing every day sometimes every hour of the day.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
My new motherboards coming tomorrow
the old one has been causing such sorrow
Crashing every day sometimes every hour of the day.
Making it difficult to keep my temper at bay.
My new motherboards coming tomorrow
the old one has been causing such sorrow
Crashing every day sometimes every hour of the day.
Making it difficult to keep my temper at bay.
Fixed it in working just fine so I have to return the one I had to borrow.
The sweetshop owner shouted Quality Streets for everyone.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The sweetshop owner shouted Quality Streets for everyone.
Only fattening ones for the people who are someone.
The sweetshop owner shouted Quality Streets for everyone.
Only fattening ones for the people who are someone.
There is always one that takes more than to they can carry.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
The sweetshop owner shouted Quality Streets for everyone.
Only fattening ones for the people who are someone.
There is always one that takes more than to they can carry.
Which at times can make them overloaded and tarry.
The sweetshop owner shouted Quality Streets for everyone.
Only fattening ones for the people who are someone.
There is always one that takes more than to they can carry.
Which at times can make them overloaded and tarry
They had to wait for there brake as no milk there waiting for the Dairyman.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Up in the sky I saw an object flying low
Up in the sky I saw an object flying low,
Maybe it be Aliens from mars you never know.
GR@PH;<'S :Hammys pint:
Up in the sky I saw an object flying low,
Maybe it be Aliens from mars you never know.
Strange lights were blinking all around.
Up in the sky I saw an object flying low,
Maybe it be Aliens from mars you never know.
Strange lights were blinking all around.
Not one of them were on the ground.
GR@PH;<'S (https://www.landzdown.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi5.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fy197%2FANG-Graphics%2Fthcoffee_zpscf290df1.gif&hash=26239a18e133675e9031c0cf793388819e1fd6a1)
Up in the sky I saw an object flying low,
Maybe it be Aliens from mars you never know.
Strange lights were blinking all around.
Not one of them were on the ground.
They were circling over me very slow.
While eating some watermelon I swallowed a seed!
While eating some watermelon I swallowed a seed!
It should be ok but rang my doctor to see if he agreed.
GR@PH;<'S (https://www.landzdown.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi5.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fy197%2FANG-Graphics%2Fthcoffee_zpscf290df1.gif&hash=26239a18e133675e9031c0cf793388819e1fd6a1)
While eating some watermelon I swallowed a seed!
It should be ok but rang my doctor to see if he agreed.
He said to open my mouth and look down my throat
While eating some watermelon I swallowed a seed!
It should be ok but rang my doctor to see if he agreed.
He said to open my mouth and look down my throat
Good god said its looks just like a Goat.
GR@PH;<'S (https://www.landzdown.com/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi5.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fy197%2FANG-Graphics%2Fthcoffee_zpscf290df1.gif&hash=26239a18e133675e9031c0cf793388819e1fd6a1)