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Topics - GR@PH;<'S

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16
Jokes / Rope not served in his bar
« on: March 02, 2015, 06:09:43 PM »
A small piece of rope climbed onto a barstool.

The bartender said he did not serve rope in his bar, and tossed it out to the street.

The rope asked a passerby to tie him into a knot, and then ruffle both ends.

The rope went back into the bar, the bartender looked down at him and said, "Hey aren’t you that same piece of rope I just tossed out?"

The rope responded: "No sir, I am a frayed knot.”

GR@PH;<'S   :Hammys pint:

17
Meet & Greet! / Happy Birthday Hardhead
« on: February 23, 2015, 07:25:57 PM »
Hardhead,
 

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18
Meet & Greet! / Happy Birthday jat38
« on: February 23, 2015, 07:24:30 PM »
jat38,
 


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19
Jokes / Fast thinking
« on: February 21, 2015, 08:23:14 PM »
A pilot is flying a small single engine plane with a lot of really important execs on board into Seattle airport. There is fog so thick that visibility is 10m, and his instruments are out. He circles looking for a landmark and after an hour, he is low on fuel and his passengers are very nervous.

At last, through a small opening in the fog he sees a tall building with one guy working alone on the fifth floor.

Circling, the pilot banks and shouts through his open window: "Hi, where am I?"

The solitary office worker replies: "You're in an airplane."

The pilot executes a swift 275 degree turn and executes a perfect blind landing on the runway five miles away. Just as the plane stops, the engines cough and die from lack of fuel. The stunned passengers asked the pilot how he did it.

"Simple," replies the pilot, "I asked the guy in that building a simple question. The answer he gave me was 100 percent correct but absolutely useless; therefore, that must be Microsoft's support office, and from there, the airport is just 5 miles away on a bearing of 87 degrees!"

GR@PH;<'S  :Hammys pint:

 

20
Meet & Greet! / Happy Birthday Coldmoon
« on: February 13, 2015, 09:05:45 AM »
 Coldmoon,
 


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21
Meet & Greet! / Happy Birthday YoKenny
« on: February 09, 2015, 06:33:34 PM »
YoKenny,
 


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22
Meet & Greet! / Happy Birthday JeanInMontana
« on: February 05, 2015, 08:17:50 PM »
JeanInMontana,
 


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23
Meet & Greet! / Happy Birthday OT_Tony
« on: February 05, 2015, 08:15:11 PM »
OT_Tony,
 


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24
Jokes / I was stopped by the police around 2 a.m yesterday
« on: February 04, 2015, 06:55:58 PM »
I was stopped by the police around 2 a.m.
The officer asked him where he was going at that time of night.
I replied,
 "I'm on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late."
The officer then asked,
 "Really? Who's giving that lecture at this time of night?"

I simply replied,

 "That would be my wife officer"

GR@PH;<'S   :Hammys pint:

25
Meet & Greet! / Happy Birthday Jeber
« on: February 02, 2015, 07:44:41 PM »
Jeber,


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26
Meet & Greet! / Happy Birthday davemaynard11
« on: February 02, 2015, 07:43:21 PM »
davemaynard11,
 


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27
Meet & Greet! / Happy Birthday jsky
« on: January 25, 2015, 01:16:33 PM »
jsky,


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28
Meet & Greet! / Welcome DGWilkie
« on: January 25, 2015, 01:15:21 PM »
DGWilkie,
:welcome2: hope you enjoy your stay 

GR@PH;<'S   :Hammys pint:

29
Jokes / Solution to end unemployment
« on: December 28, 2014, 05:50:28 PM »
Teacher to a student:
"Can you think of a solution to end unemployment?"

"Yes, sir! I'd put all the men on one island and the women on another."

"And what would they be doing then?"

"Building boats!"

GR@PH;<'S   :Hammys pint:

30
Meet & Greet! / Happy Birthday misterj
« on: November 30, 2014, 08:51:15 PM »
misterj


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