Author Topic: Family Observation  (Read 9040 times)

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Offline dickw

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Family Observation
« on: May 28, 2008, 05:33:20 AM »
My partner and I are visiting with our family 1600 kilometers south of where we live.

A little background to this story:

Our Laptop is setup in their roomy sized kitchen on part of the marble bench. Our Son in Law was organizing breakfast for the family, I was browsing Landzdown forum, when I came across a reply to a newbie on the Landzdown HijackThis forum.  I drew his attention to it as it somewhat amazed me and I wanted another opinion. 

He is a mature, fine man who is a Professorial Dean, and Doctor of Languages but most of all a teacher who incidentally is leaving today for a trip to Vienna - he is the primary speaker at an Islamic Conference over this coming weekend.  He is an Anglican Australian, not a Muslim.  We say this as most will think he is Muslim, not true, although two of his six languages are Hebrew and Arabic.

Back to the point of this thread...... here is a quote from the thread I refer to and the reason for this post.

Quote
Hi, Thedrumguru.  Why is it you only come visit us at LzD when you have a problem?    This time you have quite a nasty problem.  Let's see what we can do to get your machine cleaned and then I think we'll have to commit you to a detox center to slow down that "click here" finger.

Our daughter (who is also a teacher and Head of a Department at a private school) along with myself, my partner and Son in Law thought part of the content of the above quote was very degrading, and debilitating for a newbie who already was in need of some encouragement with their computer troubles.

This is not a criticism of the expert, in fact we wondered if it was said in jest?

Sometimes, in print, a reply appears quite strongly and can be taken the wrong way, so we all need to be careful when replying to forum posts over the internet.  In other words both my Son in law and daughter as teachers thought it sounded like a lecture for not appearing more often on this forum before asking for help.  Is there a rule as such? if so we could not find it in http://www.landzdown.com/index.php?topic=494.0

We notice regularly replies from accredited folk on some other forums who do come over strongly/abruptly to say the least, and avoid posting within those forums if we need help when we know our thread could be answered by them.

We must all remember we can become complacent replying and need to give encouragement in all posts that are answered on all forums.

Just a family observation, certainly not a criticism.

   
Learning each day
"The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good. - Samuel Johnson" (1709 - 1784)

Offline Aaron Hulett

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Re: Family Observation
« Reply #1 on: May 28, 2008, 07:06:31 AM »
Thanks dickw for being comfortable at our online home to share your and your family's thoughts.  One of the big challenges of online communication is the lack of witnessing expression, both spoken and unspoken.  When we communicate in person, and to a certain degree over the phone or webcam/microphone, we can hear the person's tone of voice, see their facial expressions, as well as their body language, and better understand in what way the information's being said.  Online, all we get is some text, and we internalize those things we cannot experience, and we internalize them based on our own personal experiences, our own map of reality.

Personally, I read that as a joking, but also serious way to say, "Stop infecting yourself!  Come see us when you're not infected, we'll help you get protected and provide best practices, as well as answer any questions you may have."  I come to this view based on my own personal experiences, my map of things.  For me that's the smily face in the text (it didn't make it in the quote above for some reason, but it's there), along with knowing the person outside the confides of these forums (both in IRC chat as well as working together in the past at another online forum).  Of course, I can be way off on this, but that's how I personally read it.  Only one person knows their intent, and that's the original poster of that quote, but I both see how I can come to the view I come to, and at the same time can see how you and your family can come to the view you have, and neither of us is more right or wrong in our interpretations.

(Hopefully this makes sense?  I'm both tired and my allergies are driving me crazy today... not sure if it's the trees or if there's weed pollen in the air, but there's certainly something in the air right now.  Ugh!)

No, there's no rule that suggests one must participate in the forums for an arbitrary period of time before requesting assistance, so no worries there.  Someone can register and their first post be a request for assistance, or offering assistance, or even participating in some of the "fun" threads in the LandzDown Lounge.

In any case, it's a good reminder about how interacting online in a text-only medium has its challenges, and that we should "step into others' shoes" to see how things can come across.  On occasion, it can occur where some may see the communication one way, and someone else in another way, and that's ok, it's going to happen, but I really believe that our forums here at LandzDown have a spirit of togetherness and friendliness that makes this place unique.  I'm sure you feel the same, too, as if you didn't, I don't believe you would have been comfortable to share this with us, and given you did share with us, I truly do appreciate it.  :)

Aaron

Offline dickw

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Re: Family Observation
« Reply #2 on: May 28, 2008, 10:19:33 AM »
Quote
In any case, it's a good reminder about how interacting online in a text-only medium has its challenges, and that we should "step into others' shoes" to see how things can come across.

The above quote from your post is exactly what we wished to achieve by posting the thread in the first instance.......

We find that in some cases there is a distinct arrogance with some accredited Malware volunteers which is sad from our perspective.  We are not young, have been around forums and life in general a long time so in some cases their demeanor needs to be bought to their attention me thinks and with this thread it may make them take time off to look at themselves in the mirror for a spell

I missed the smile in the original thread.......sorry - you are right, it did not end up in the quote in our original post which I cut and  pasted.......... no idea why not.

Quote
This is not a criticism of the expert, in fact we wondered if it was said in jest?


Please note we did wonder if the comment was in jest...... giving the benefit of the doubt.

We did think seriously about posting a thread at all, as it seems Administrators and the like are only too willing to ban a member if anything bordering on a criticism appears.  In fact I have a close friend that this happened to sometime ago. A year later in an unrelated issue they had to change ISP'S, registered again with a different username, and now are one of the most respected volunteers on that particular forum.

There have been other occasions of this (which are not necessary to relate) on this particular forum.  If in posting our thread we have achieved just for folk to simply stand back and look at their posts before clicking "post" then we are happy.

We were gratified at your reply Aaron, you are young, but with an old head on your shoulders which is good to see in this age of not allot of understanding from the younger generation.  You yourself will go far in life and we both wish you well.  :goodie:

Learning each day
"The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good. - Samuel Johnson" (1709 - 1784)

Offline Corrine

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Re: Family Observation
« Reply #3 on: May 28, 2008, 10:05:29 PM »
Quote
Our daughter (who is also a teacher and Head of a Department at a private school) along with myself, my partner and Son in Law thought part of the content of the above quote was very degrading, and debilitating for a newbie who already was in need of some encouragement with their computer troubles.
When the same person returns with a severely infected computer four times in a year and has not always followed through with the requested logs, a message needs to be communicated, which was my attempt in a kidding fashion.  I'm sorry you didn't notice the smilie.  At other sites where I participate, "frequent fliers" (people who continually get reinfected) are refused help.  There are logs that literally take hours to research, only to have the poster not follow the requested instructions or not follow through for the remaining cleanup -- which this person has also done not just recently but in the past as well.  In the meantime, hundreds of logs go unanswered daily. 

BTW, although I do not have the credentials of your amazing son-in-law [I understand the background as my father-in-law also was a Doctor of Languages (having obtained that degree twice, once in Europe and again in the U.S.) and was Chair of the Modern Language Department.  Neither of the eight languages were Hebrew or Arabic but twice he was invited to the Vatican.], I have worked over 41 years in the Legal Department of a well known international company, have two grown children, two beautiful granddaughters and have achieved a certain level of respect both at work and in the security community.  Should you question something I post in the future, please feel free to contact me.  It is certainly easy to make a mistake and I would not want to intentionally hurt someone's feelings.


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